Search this site

Boy Blunder and the realisation of disappointed expectations Angus gets burnt at CPAC The Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) is yet another example of imported Americana —this local version is an annual celebration of sanctimony and self-interest. CPAC 2026 was a Trumpy miserere of flabby-joweled wealth fetishists, man-spreaders and those who dry their hair in a microwave oven. It did not go well for our hero. CPAC responds to Angus's me-too pitch CPAC Australia's mission is to "restore conservative leadership and defend the values that built this country." Conservatives lie to themselves when they presume a monopoly on reward for effort, freedom, personal responsibility and family. CPAC is a group delusion that touts a rigid interpretation of such values and derides any variation as lefty indoctrination—deploying the catchall "woke" as the go-to pejorative. As an indication of the warm, amenable tone of such events, last year’s CPAC featured speakers criticising Spud Dutton as “Labor-lite”¹. CPAC represents the interests of anti-elite billionaires and a meritocracy that embraces royalty. They are small governmenters bitching about how government has neglected them. Humbug, hyperbole and hypocrisy were the unspoken themes of CPAC 2026, although that was lost on organisers and attendees due to a chronic lack of self-awareness. The touted purpose was to bring together the three main right-wing parties. Their shared mission is to oust the only true centre-right party—Albanese's. His is a government that is "destroying our country" by being insufficiently expedient in the devastation of the ecosphere, too indulgent of the indigenous and not at all enthusiastic about examining the genitals of participants in women's sport. It's also a government that is too tolerant of the brownish folk. Migration has now become a Dutch auction. Racism is, of course, Hanson's foundational motivation—gutting of migration, economic consequences be damned, is her catch cry. The Boy Blunder has soiled himself morally by participating and he's taken his braggadocio and shot it in the head right there on stage. All his claims to principled leadership and sound economic management are extinguished. “The Liberals talking about migration doesn’t create more Liberal voters, it creates more One Nation voters." Simon Welsh, Redbridge Group A three-way had been envisioned—not a Dirty Buchanan, neither a Rambunctious Rupert nor the violating of Leviticus*. All off the table. That should go some way to restoring your appetite. The options discussed were election preferencing strategies to be agreed between the trio of libido suppressants of Taylor, Canavan and Hanson. Private school posh twat, risible cos player and fried fish retailer. *Thanks to the slang dictionary for its definitions of various tripartite copulatory methodologies. Many a retrogressive luminary was in attendance. There was Liz Truss, a suitable portent of gloom to fit in with the doomer vibe, the cockroach of the UK Tory nuclear apocalypse basking in the after-glow of her record 49 days in office. Drunkerby, of course, the puce, priapic Yosemite Sam from New England—with the face of an interrupted sneeze launching one of his apoplectic, digressive tirades. Something about wind turbines being a plot to slow the earth's rotation or some such. Token minority Jacinta Name-ya Price, supporter of the disenfranchised poor, party-hopper, would-be PM and Qantas Chairman's Lounge habitué enjoyed the endangered species canapes and Châteauneuf-du-Pape. Over there—it's Barclay McGain, expired toolie, whose very name evokes an image of 'entitled, uppity little prick', who is now CPAC Brand Relations Manager no less—"with a talent for digital engagement ...working his magic at the Freedom and Hope Gala Dinner". But, I digress. Back to the headline acts. Sooty Canavan in his hi-vis prosthetic personality (coal miner cos play at Brisbane's swish Royal International Convention Centre FFS!) was as authentic as ever—a coal scuttle in a space shuttle. No coal dust cosmetics this time, but he must think little of his audience if he believes this fancy dress charade adds to his credibility. Karl Stefanovic interviews Sooty and the Ginger Whinger. Photograph: Russell Freeman/AAP via The Guardian The star of the show was reportedly Pauline™, receiving a standing ovation and the rattling of loose dentures. Hanson signed a pledge “to work together”, challenging Taylor and Canavan to follow suit. It came just hours after she’d told the conference they shouldn’t trust the Coalition. “‎Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I’m an agent of chaos.” The Joker from The Dark Knight. Supposedly the star attraction, Taylor was the default warm-up act, booed when he dodged questions from Karl Stefanovic about why he wasn’t trying harder to work with Hanson. "I am not a career politician …" Squizzy Taylor. MP since 2013, former Minister now Opposition Leader and aspiring PM Hanson put the slipper in by labelling Taylor a "smarmy management consultant" and naming Tony Bozozoic Abbott as her pick as the next Liberal leader. The Boy Blunder will likely have picked up on the old bat's signal. ¹As reported by The Guardian.

Coalitionland - an imaginary world where everything is backward Down the coal mine with Squizzy and Sooty The federal Coalition—"where logic and time are backward, running is required just to stay in the same place, and memory works backward into the future." From Lewis Carroll’s Through the Looking-Glass, The Libs (with their rustic, tag-along-for-the-freebies National Party chums) are the self-professed natural party of government. The big swinging dicks, the hairy-chested alpha males and born to rule toffs of the R.M.Williams-bedecked old boys' networks. Yet they have been out-manoeuvred by a nasty, ginger crone who ran a chippy after dropping out of school at 15. To be fair, this has not come about due to the smarts of said fried fish retailer whose personal brand is industrial-grade stupidity and pig ignorance. The gift to Pauline Hanson's aspirations is Squizzy Taylor and Sooty Canavan. Squizzy’s strategy has been to lend credibility to Hanson's agenda by copying it. When his greatest threat comes from a dim-witted fuckwit, Squizzy's brilliant notion is to out-fuckwit her. Albo? Is that you? À la One Nation, in the midst of accelerating climate catastrophes and Australia's embrace of wind and solar, Squizzy and Sooty proclaim they'll kill off all climate and green energy initiatives, and that they'll facilitate the build of new coal-fired power stations. Venturing ever backwards they denigrate EVs once more—a reanimation of the idiocy of Mickey The Trash¹, the phlegm fatale of Scooter Morrison's 2019 election campaign. Culture wars are to be reinvigorated - they'll warn of woke hordes of Greens-voting trans drag queens brainwashing our kiddies in Welcome to Country ceremonies. Migrants are to be the villains du jour as the momentum behind One Nation's grievance peddling builds. It was the Nats who gifted One Nation their regional base—by abandoning them, to kowtow to mining interests as their constituency of choice. As the Nat's accidental grand fubar, Sooty has forgone his coalface cos-play in favour of the rolled-up shirt-sleeves affectation deployed for the TV cameras by his aptronymic predecessor David Littleproud. No doubt he believes this conveys the gravitas that was lacking in his hi-vis, pencil-necked coal dust cosmetics that was more Mr Squiggle than horny-handed coal miner. Sooty's dress-ups will not forestall the extinction of the Nats as a party of any consequence - he's performing to an empty theatre. When the discursive diatribes of the beetroot-headed Humpty Numpty of Braddon footpath infamy improve the coherence of One Nation's whingefests it says much about how logic and substance does not matter that much to the gormless supporters of the Oxley Moron². "When I use a word, it means just what I choose it to mean—neither more nor less." Humpty Dumpty. Through the Looking-Glass. “There are a lot of people out there and members of parliament who are pedophilia“, "pecuniar of interests", "I haven't flip-flopped. I said no originally, then I said yes, then I said no and I stuck to it." This is the quality of discourse that Squizzy and Sooty struggle to counter. The Red Queen, "the cause of all the mischief", "Humpty Numpty had a great fall". Lewis Carroll bastardised Tweedledumb and Tweedledumber, little men “looking so exactly like a couple of big schoolboys”... "...a monstrous crow frightened both the heroes so." Can these two form any credible appeal to the sentient conservatives out there? “The time has come,” the Walrus said, “To talk of many things... And whether pigs have wings.” The Walrus and the Carpenter ¹Mickey The Trash - automotive engineering savant: A Bandersnatch after a VO5 overdose ²Kudos to @MikeCarlton01 who coined this epithet for Hanson. Jabberwocky By Lewis Carroll ’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves Did gyre and gimble in the wabe: All mimsy were the borogoves, And the mome raths outgrabe. “Beware the Jabberwock, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun The frumious Bandersnatch!” He took his vorpal sword in hand; Long time the manxome foe he sought— So rested he by the Tumtum tree And stood awhile in thought. And, as in uffish thought he stood, The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame, Came whiffling through the tulgey wood, And burbled as it came! One, two! One, two! And through and through The vorpal blade went snicker-snack! He left it dead, and with its head He went galumphing back. “And hast thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!” He chortled in his joy. ’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves Did gyre and gimble in the wabe: All mimsy were the borogoves, And the mome raths outgrabe. "...it’s rather hard to understand! … Somehow it seems to fill my head with ideas–only I don’t exactly know what they are!” said Alice. Full of nonsense, and seemingly devoid of meaning, but still sounding like proper English.

Evangelical cultists jump aboard Face Ache's pelican express This image was created with AI The Exclusive Brethren's Elect Vessel fills in the missing bit of One Nation's Trumpism - Jesus's endorsement Various neo-Nazi groups, the KKK and now loons from the Exclusive Brethren support Pauline Hanson. It's hardly surprising that the far-right niche markets of cookers, cultists and christofascists should feel an affinity with Frau Blücher—it's the same festering ecosystem that thrives under her bone-spurred hero, the catering trolley commando of Operation Tandoori Chicken: The chicken ducks out of Turkey. Trump scurries from the NATO summit in Ankara, leaving his toadies as decoys. Hansonism is the domestic manifestation of MAGA world. The Exclusive Brethren are dotting the i's. Until now, the talking snake brigade of apocalyptic, biblical literalists has been missing from the Temu Trump noodle collective that is Hanson fandom. The Sydney Morning Herald¹ reported that Bruce Hales, the Exclusive Brethren cult's Elect Vessel—“so close to the Lord Jesus that he can feel his heartbeat”—praised the “red-haired lady” at a recent religious meeting. The Vessel™ also suggested Australia should use its uranium to “build a few bombs” to obliterate Iran. In a loving, Godly way. Of course. Nuking Iran is an option canvassed by the Ranga's witless orange idol. The connection here is how often unhinged deliriums align across the spectrum of far-right infestations. However, Hanson has never claimed divine endorsement. Instead she worships at the altar of Mammon and at the feet of her divinities—the rapey, discoloured Grifter-In-Chief and the hula-hoop-phobic Gina 'does-my-arse-make-this-muumuu-look-big' Rinehart. Hanson laps up Big Vag's largesse but she may be a tad shy about wholeheartedly embracing Mr Vessel's blessing given the Brethren's alleged subcontracting of election interference to neo-Nazis for the benefit of the Liberal Party, as reported by the SMH² Australia’s neo-Nazi movement declared it would back One Nation’s path to government if the High Court overturns a ban on its new White Australia Party. Ersatzfrankenspanker Thomas Sewell bumptiously announced his intention to “assist the creation of a Pauline Hanson prime ministership": "Our purpose would be to support One Nation in forming government.” In the first episode of a 2026 current affairs series 'Trump's America' presented by 9News, Ku Klux Klan Grand Wizard Thomas Robb volunteered praise for Hanson and her anti-immigration and anti-multiculturalism stances, explaining that her political platform aligns closely with the KKK's views on "white awareness".³ Hanson played her dog-eared victim card when confronted by the reality of her fellow travellers. She called the KKK segment "grubby journalism" and said any suggestion that they share a common ideology was "absurd and offensive". This came after she had linked Anthony Albanese to Hamas. Hanson may publicly decry the fringe nasties who accumulate around her—they're flies attracted to the turd, but what she cannot deny is that they recognise the compatibility of their egregious zealotry with hers. She's as much defined by these aberrant fanatics as she is by her rabid devotion to one of the most comprehensively loathsome characters in all of history. All polls show Trump's allure rapidly fading, our polls show Hanson's popularity rising. We're always a step or two behind the Americans. They've awoken to the consequences of dictatorial, corrupt incompetence. Made-in-China merch and god-bothering cheer squads won't help the bitter old bag Hanson trash Oz the way Trump has trashed the USA. ¹ ‘More power to redheads’: Brethren leader backs Hanson, building nuclear bombs Michael Bachelard and Sherryn Groch, SMH 22 September, 2026 ($) ² ‘Tail, film, heckle’: Inside the Brethren’s secret election influence plot with the far-right. Michael Bachelard and Sherryn Groch, SMH 22 September, 2026 ($) "Leaked messages reveal the full story of how the Exclusive Brethren secretly recruited neo-Nazi associates to harass MPs at the election. As the church denies it, one elder confirms his involvement." ³ Trump’s America: The Divided States - a four-part documentary series produced by 9News God, Christ, man, woman: The ‘divine order’ that defines life for Exclusive Brethren women. SMH 7 September 2025. ($) "The unspoken belief among the Brethren, she says, is that nothing a woman could say is important enough to be heard in church...the wealthy, the powerful and the “priestly” sit in the front rows of the assembly" “We’re closer to it [the Rapture], I think, than we realise ... it’s not distant ... there’s not much time left.” Bruce Hales, Picton, NSW, April 6, 2025 Arithmatic Hanson style Frau Blücher Young Frankenstein. Mel Brookes

...a consequential number of Australians are MAGA-level nasty, ignorant and deluded? Alan Moir cartoons Imagine the Ginger Whinger wielding real power. Imagine the consequences. As of 28 August 2026, Pauline Hanson explicitly framed her objectives as getting One Nation into government and getting Anthony Albanese's Labor government out of office. Is that fanciful or is it feasible? One Nation is flypaper for the gormless—crackpots, village idiots, racist uncles, cookers, rubes and oiks (and Queenslanders—but I repeat myself)—who make up its traditional base of around 5–7% nationally. One Nation's brand is 'champion of anti-immigration'. Code for 'racist'. Its genesis was Hanson's strident indignation at attempts to address systemic disadvantage experienced by Indigenous Australians. That morphed into Yellow Peril V2 ("I believe we are in danger of being swamped by Asians") thence to "How can you tell me there are good Muslims?". That's her foundational appeal - the politics of whiny grievance and resentment built upon bigotry. Anti-mass immigration rally in Canberra. Dominic Giannini/AAP Hanson's opposition to immigration is not about sustainability or attracting desirable skills and talents - it is hostility to multiculturalism and particular ethnic and religious groups (“It’s not the country that I grew up in”). She is an obdurate, opinionated scold and a shrew with, as the Scots' idiom goes, 'a face like a dog licking pish from a nettle'. She is stupid, she is ignorant. And she's as gullible as a MAGA with an expired pick-up truck registration and a pair of gold-coloured Trump sneakers - a patsy for billionaires you could say. But lately her popularity has boomed. So, someone has been tuning her piano, polishing the stool. “She is weapons-grade stupid, but she is adept at making crowds angry,” however the crowd “turned off” when she attempted to prosecute “anything remotely serious”. An attendee about Hanson at the Dubbo Bush Summit, August 2026 as reported by Crikey One Notion has tapped into the angsty zeitgeist, extending its reach beyond its low information, rusted-on base while disguising its core, odious ideology. Immigration → population growth → housing pressure → rents → infrastructure pressure → congestion → declining living standards. That's a logical progression but it's too considered for a simpleton like Hanson. Its scarlet head upon its wattled neck protrudes from its hunch at an awkward slant—a tortoise emerging from its shell, blinking uncomprehendingly into the light. ON has learned to launder cultural grievance through material anxiety. Whoever is guiding this will need to go beyond Hanson's simplistic hit parade of racially-based grievances and performative rage-baiting. Protest voting in Farrer and now WA's Secret Harbour is one thing. Endorsing a moron like Hanson for a position of real power is something else. No doubt many will stick with One Nation, particularly given the spectacular self-harm being indulged in by the Libs at national and state levels. And then there's Albanese's lack of judgement. It was underlined by his tryhard, cringeworthy ScoMo moment of "oooh, boobies, hurr hurr" on a smut-branded podcast. It comes through too frequently on matters of import and it's further damaging his reputation and Labor's by association. Also, Labor's complacency is a gift to ON, its cause being threefold: they hold a huge majority, they assume they'll inherit most centrist, Green and other lefty preferences, and they have an expectation that the right-wing vote will be split between Libs, Nats, ON, Clive Palmer and the fiscally conservative independents. The Secret Harbour result is what happens when economic anger goes unanswered. A once safe Labor seat with demographics outside ON's standard catchment puts the lie to scenarios 1 and 2 - Labor's national majority is wide but it's not deep. The third scenario won't help Labor if the Tories are by then reduced to an annoying background thrum - a process that is well underway, helped along by their craven bestowing of credibility upon ON through imitation and playing footsies with preference swapping. Liberal preferences secured Secret Harbour for ON. Oz has its share of shitweasles and the befuddled. MAGA does not have a monopoly on the nasty, the ignorant or the deluded—here it has its brand imitators. The MAGA patois is being deployed (“patriots”, “truth-tellers”, “authenticity—He/she tells it like it is”, “Marxist, commie, Nazi lefttards”) as is the militaristic language of “insurgency”, “force” and “terrorism” which together construct a narrative that frames minority groups as threats. "Immigration" is Hanson and co.'s Trumpist/Faragist nudge, nudge, wink, wink recruitment strategy to reach those who are not outright racists but are legitimately concerned about the country's rapidly changing demographics. It's working. Is it working enough though? Despite the prognostications of some political cognoscenti I do not for one moment believe that this country will ever put Hanson into any position of significant consequence - particularly the prime ministership. She is a clownish naïf - out of her depth, thin-skinned and paranoid, with no ability to comprehend nuance, complexities and eventuality. She is entirely comfortable that her ignorance trumps the experts with their fancy evidence, facts and science. "To the poorly educated and disaffected “expertise” sounds like a code word for condescension"*. Science: "The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existence. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvellous structure of reality..." Albert Einstein. Hanson: "Only still allow to the Chinese to come in there the belting road projects the ports that they're building and that's like they've said to us up you we're actually going to just take the Chinese and have them here." National Press Club speech. Hanson fans may rationalise her gibberings as authenticity (which, ironically, it is. She's an authentic idiot) but even the semi-sentient can recognise the implications. Almost three out of every four ON voters say politicians “usually look after themselves”, yet they believe Hanson has their interests at heart despite her obsequience to, and 𝗉̶𝖺̶𝗅̶𝗆̶ ̶𝗀̶𝗋̶𝖾̶𝖺̶𝗌̶𝗂̶𝗇̶𝗀̶ largesse from billionaire Gina The Hutt, and her open admiration for the most venal and corrupt politician on the planet: “I like Trump. I like his policies and I think we’re on the same page.” Hanson at Mar-a-Lago CPAC, 2025 The orange Rape Van Winkle is anathema in Australia. The appeal of Hanson's supposed authenticity will wane as her embrace of the vulgar rich at the expense of her base becomes too brazen to excuse. Imagine Hanson in power and Big Vag cashing in the IOUs - noting that that egregious, muumuued person of girth has suggested surrendering land in Townsville to the Israelis for testing bombs and rockets and donating islands to Elon Musk. for rocket launches. Donating. Giving away. Free islands. To the world's richest man. From which to make even more money*. (Bring forth the tumbrils.) *Townsville Bush Summit 18 June 2026. Keep in mind that identifying any detailed or substantiated ON policy is like arm-wresting custard, but any contemplation of the implications of Hanson in power needs to consider many scenarios. Here's a few: Imagine a global financial crisis, even a depression, brought about by Trump's Iranian misadventure spiralling further out of control. Barnaby Cockfondle, rural accountant, limp faller and enthusiast of the haddock pastie, would likely be the treasurer/finance minister in any ON administration. You do the maths. Accelerating natural disasters, being witnessed globally, do not require imagination. What does is homuncular climate change denier and conspiracy theorist Malcolm Grassy Noel Roberts as science minister. Further investments in clean energy will be kyboshed, energy costs will skyrocket as decrepit coal power is kept on life support, disaster recovery and mitigation blows the budget, and that wizened little prick will continue to pretend that nuclear power is the answer. 20 years to come online, and requiring underwriting with public money. Hanson has said two nuclear reactors should be built on the east coast, which is at odds with her party's official policy. Hanson, quoted on high CO₂ emissions: "a million underwater volcanos releasing the carbon dioxide," (a cause for something that doesn't exist apparently). ≈1,000 potentially active submarine volcanoes are thought to exist worldwide. Human emissions are up to 270 times greater than all combined global volcanic emissions. Also Hanson—after a brief snorkel on the Great Barrier Reef she disputed scientists' warnings of its vulnerability to climate change and claimed it is in robust good health along its entire 2,300km length. "We can't have these lies put across by people with their own agendas," she said vacuously and without a hint of self-awareness.¹ Consider Defence - typically thought of as a right-wing strength and always the biggest budget item. Defence expenditure is focused on high-tech, complex systems and equipment oversighted by government. "Is it true that pump-jet submarines can only stay underwater for 20 minutes?". Hanson, in Senate Estimates asked this of a Rear Admiral who heads up the submarine program. This is the fuckwit some think can lead the country. Hanson is a control freak, leading a party of freaks and weirdos. Who can imagine that querulous bleating conveying any authority or gravitas whatsoever? Who can envision her default mode of bitching and moaning in any interactions with heads of state, captains of industry and global leaders? Who would not be embarrassed at the thought of her representing Australia at international forums? Who would think this whiny, fried fish retailer could hold her own and protect Australia's best interests in any dealings with hard-arsed autocrats, kleptocrats or psychopaths such as Trump, Putin and the tech bro oligarchs? Most know it's beyond her. She knows it's beyond her. She's been indulged by the corporate media for her entertainment value but reality is dawning. The very notion of Hanson in power is alarming. But the person most fearful at the prospect of Pauline Hanson becoming prime minister is Pauline Hanson. *One Nation’s battler lie unravels. Urban Wronski ¹Scientists discovered chlorofluorocarbons were bad for the ozone, countries believed them, the Montreal Protocol was signed, and CFC use fell by 99.7%, leading to the stabilization of the ozone layer, perhaps the greatest example of global cooperation in history. What we know (and don’t) about One Nation’s rapid rise in the polls. ABC News.

The "natural party of government"™ is being outplayed by a ginger coiffed moron Will the Libs totally surrender all credibility and integrity by entering into a coalition with One Nation to govern Victoria after the November election? Don't bet against it. When removed from power, the behaviour of the entitled, born-to-rule natural party of government—the self-proclaimed superior economic managers—is as execrable as it is predictable. After all, this is the party that could not accept the outcome of the 1972 federal election nor the subsequent failure of the voters to correct their mistake at the following '74 double dissolution, so they orchestrated a coup against the twice elected Whitlam government. In such a circumstance as voters not acknowledging their right to reign, the indignation of our betters is palpable. Their faux outrage at invented perils, their hyperbolic claims of imminent doom, performative tirades, partisan sniping and unrelenting negativism are all designed to sow FUD and undermine the legitimacy of their opponents. Consequences for national well-being be damned. "The Tories, every election, must have a bogy man. If you haven't got a programme, a bogy man will do." Aneurin Bevan (15 November 1897 – 6 July 1960). Welsh Labour Party politician. Even outbidding the timorous Albanese government on vision and initiative is beyond them - entitlement feeds a lack of imagination and effort. Apart from the stultifying inertia, the differentiator for the Tories is their prosecution of the culture wars within which to wrap their 'privatise the profits/socialise the losses' dogma. (Also, God is on their side but let us return to that at some future point). Their war on woke is sour-faced, purse-lipped, curtain-twitching 1950s wowserism redux. What we are seeing is the gabble and scrabble of a party bereft of ideas and talent that sees Menzies, Howard and Abbott held up as icons of sagacity - fit for the 1950s and, so, fit for the 2050s. Ideas man Angus Taylor couldn't make an impression on a bean bag. He is so inconsequential he doesn't leave a shadow on even the sunniest of days. As for nous, there's a whistling sound whenever he turns his head sideways to the wind. 2IC Jane Hume is the Libs' nod to those pesky women voters. As per Tory gender roles she is not expected to convey gravitas or acumen and she always meets such expectations. She consistently wears the "oh, fuck!" expression of the neighbour's spaniel caught mid shit on your front lawn. Dan Tehan is a bloke who sorts his crayons by taste but crayons are the closest this non-entity has ever come to having any colour. A funereal presence, Danny Boy, as Shadow Minister for Immigration and Citizenship, has the challenge of dog-whistling to the racists drifting across to One Nation but without upsetting either migrant-exploiting farmers or the business lobby. Michaelia Cash, typically waving her arms about like she'd walked through a spider web, is a goose-stepping tribute to the robustness of VO5. She is given to bogan-vowelled conniptions delivered with the aplomb of an air raid siren. Mickey's been laying low lately. Does she not want to be reminded of her enthusiastic endorsement of Spud Dutton's Trump characteristics? Is it her embarrassment over her previous denigration of EVs now that the orange Rape Van Winkle has caused a global oil shock? Who cares? If she'd calm the fuck down for the foreseeable future it would only help the Lib cause. These nongs are some of the best of the best, the haut monde of the Liberal Party where personal privilege is dressed up as economic principle. Them now indulging the lunatic fringe via a squabble with One Nation over the niche market of cookers, cultists and christofascists may be their last hurrah. But wait - there's another option. The Labor government in Victoria is, understandably, on shaky ground despite the state Liberals displaying the discipline, cohesion and sense of purpose of English football hooligans at a Latin mass. The Libs may well win the most seats but without securing a majority, therefore needing confidence and supply support from crossbenchers, crossbench minor parties or independents. They will then logically seek same from One Nation. What price the Ginger Whinger would seek to extract is speculative given her fundamental grievance, immigrants, is a federal issue. Despite some pundits and the doomsayers suggesting One Nation could form the Victorian government that is not going to happen in Australia's most progressive state. What we should ask is whether One Nation would seek, and would the Libs agree, to forming a coalition in Victoria to jointly govern? The Liberal Party is broken. Is it that broken? Functionally and ethically? Ladies and gentlemen - your alternative Attorney General

You can't tie a bow on bullshit The sideshow freaks of the RWNJ goat rodeo embrace Pauline™ as her wheels begin to wobble Pauline Hanson and her consigliere/crime scene cleaner James Ashby flew to London this month for hands-down-trousers sessions with like-minded grievance peddlers, spivs, wingnuts and the spigots of bile of the global populist-right ecosystem; ironically, in the middle of a record-breaking heatwave. Hanson proceeded to gazump fellow snollygoster Nigel Farage - huffily pointing out to the media that she's been an openly racist cunt well before Nige had learned to market his own odious personality. Farage's approval rating has plummeted to its lowest level since the UK general election amid the row over 𝖻̶𝗋̶𝗂̶𝖻̶𝖾̶𝗌̶ donations from chummy dodgy operators¹. In his then too-clever-by-half Clacton by-election diversion he is currently polling behind Count Binface, a man who wears a garbage bin on his head. Nige has a propensity to pop a gasket when such consequences are pointed out. Remind you of anyone? ¹$9.6 million donation from a crypto billionaire and gifts from a felon known as “Posh George”. Cowboy Blob, One Nation's extravagantly-hatted treasury spokesdrunk and champion of the bush, the empurpled Rhubarnaby Joyce, who had joined the looney right Alliance for Responsible Citizenship conference in London earlier, noted that sharing ideas with Nazi Nige is a sensible step. Accused sexual harasser and rampant drunkard lectured Albo that his remarks during a podcast interview were "beneath the office of Prime Minister". Rupert Lowe, an MP who was booted from Reform UK and created Restore Britain, a party further to the right of Nigel Farage’s was another to publicly enjoy and share the carefully crafted musings of the moronic ranga. Nominative determinism may have been what the Tories had in mind when they anointed Liz Truss as their recovery from their disembowelling of Boris Johnson - a truss being a specialized compression garment designed to push protruding innards back into place. Hmm, yeah...bit of a tortured metaphor that - best to return to the well used lettuce snark. Outlasted by a cos, sunk by an iceberg, given the rocket and so forth. What is amusing is the level of self delusion of Truss's truly heroic, Trumpian lack of self-awareness, intellect, ability, judgement, knowledge, insight, introspection or foresight; and Hanson's recognition and embrace of a fellow cretin. Don't bother looking up the video of their shared podcast - there's more whine in it than in Dan Murphy's. Stephen Yaxley-Lennon t/a Tommy Robinson is a high profile soccer hooligan and multiple felon with whom Hanson has shared racist underpinnings wrapped in a flag and retailed as nativist victimhood to spook the tremulous, manipulate the credulous and the determinately stupid and to incite the cookers and Nazi-adjacent. She's shouting it from the rooftops in case you weren't clear on One Nation's foundational one notion. (As an aside - Hanson began her political career in local government with a campaign to prevent the building of a library in Ipswich because she thought it was a waste of ratepayers’ money.) Hanson’s likeability dropped 11 points in a month following her National Press Club bleatings on 17 June wherein she sledged a goodly majority of people from immigrants and child care workers to climate scientists and the widely trusted ABC. Her dance card populated with far right whackjobs will not improve her prospects. The latest Resolve Political Monitor poll shows One Nation support has dropped a further three points, the party’s third straight week of declining support. But there's one big reason Hanson will crash and burn. She's a nasty, deeply stupid, gormless muppet. She's a fuckwit. One thought on the Clacton contenders: the ‘establishment’ looks a bit different these days, doesn’t it? "Under fire over his recently exposed penchant for taking mental amounts of money and benefits from Thailand-based cryptophiliacs/convicted fraudsters and their mums, Nigel has decided to seek validation by asking the voters of Clacton to rule on him." Marina Hyde in fine form. The Guardian UK

A stale, pale, female has delusions of grandeur “If it happens that I need to be Prime Minister of this country, I’m going to go for it”. Touted as a future prime minister, her three-decade long political ambition was dogged by political miscalculations and scandals. No, not Pauline Hanson, but colourful rorting identity Bronwyn Bishop, another free plane ride enthusiast. After being hit by the karma bus Bronnie declared she'd focus on keeping the northern beaches safe from Islamic terrorism. She has proven to be effective. As has my elephant repellent given no elephants have been seen around here since I bought it. * * * * * From 2017 to 2021 Americans experienced an orange wave of corruption, malignant narcissism and incompetence from a perfidious, petty, needy, grifting, be-cankled. thin-skinned, truth averse vulgarian, mob boss and sex predator and then, in 2024 after he'd dodged a jail cell and had clearly demonstrated his unfitness for the job, they voted for him again. A horse-faced spiv, Nigel Farage, was the architect of the now widely acknowledged self-harm that was Brexit and yet he easily leads across most polls - Reform frequently places first in UK national voting intentions. Pauline Hanson is a malignant, moronic, pig-ignorant, one-trick pony who admires both men and imagines herself to be PM material. “I think Pauline has capabilities – let’s make that unequivocal. I premise that at least she’s run something – a shop." Drunkerby Joyce madly rummaging through the slim pickings of Hanson's CV It seems Australians are not immune to the MAGA/Reform virus - the disengagement from reality in favour of an avatar for grievance and outrage. Hanson's recent National Press Club address was the expected querulous bleatings of a nincompoop. The feint to victimhood as her default defence against enquiry, with no humour, no nuance, no insights and no answers but a vocabulary of complaint layered over a base of hate and negativity. "Every attempt has been made for years to silence me" she whined in her opening remarks. She's had more exposure than a stripper's fanny FFS and has her own mononym ala Cher, Sting and Caligula - Pauline™. This self-pitying snivelling runs alongside thirty years of complaining that she has been ignored. Lacking grace and wit she rolled out her Hadda Gutfull greatest hits - targeting immigration, multiculturalism, Indigenous and climate institutions, the ABC and SBS, renewable energy, the “transgender insurgency” (what?) and journalists. Child care, low paid workers' rights, women’s reproductive rights, the UN and the WEF were also in a crowded field of targets that “I’m sick and tired of…” Whinging that employees are too often “lazy … they’re on their phones, they don’t show up” in parallel with her bitching that she's being picked on when her own abysmal attendance record is called out is a level of hypocrisy that would earn her kudos at a Liberal Party cabinet meeting. (She attended about 53% of Senate divisions (votes) and 28 of 239 hearing days for Senate Estimates hearings.) The cognoscenti claim swathes of newly minted ON supporters feel abandoned by major parties as the wealth divide grows and billionaires thrive. Billionaire wealth grew by $50,000 per minute. So what do these newbie Hansonistas do? They support an oblivious grifter who is pandering to vested interests and is being exploited as a useful idiot by billionaires. Hanson markets herself as a champion of unheard Australians, calling for a “monocultural” Australia, standing up for those 'ornry Strayans - in a Straya populated by the Strain purple', where swarthy immigrants who can't speak English proper are not welcome. Grievance is her identity. The political outsider, challenging the elites, a voice for the voiceless, "one of us" daring to say what others won't, championing the left behind. The maverick shtick won't hold up if the minger leads the main party of opposition. The victimhood, the underdog status delivered in a quavering whine of complaint ("I don't like it") has held up through Big Vag's Gulfsteam flights to Felonious Chunk's Kitscharama Sur La Mer to rub shoulders with her orange god and his me-love-you-long-time rent-a-wife. There's the loaner plane, endorsements from billionaire tax dodgers and slave wage enthusiasts and attacks on her own base by routinely opposing wage justice for the poorly paid. The disaffected may lodge a grouse via an opinion poll but would they follow through on a ballot paper when this shyster's shallowness and betrayal become too apparent to ignore? Matt Golding of The Age and The Sydney Morning Herald Imagine Australia's A$2.9 trillion economy under the stewardship of an innumerate imbecile who thinks managing the nation's finances is akin the balancing the books of a suburban chippy. Imagine her or the rhubarb-faced one negotiating trade terms with Xi Jinping at a G20 summit. Imagine not being embarrassed by the sight of the silly cow at such a forum. Imagine an Australia shaped by a control freak whose own organisation has been characterised by chaos and dysfunction. Imagine how our Asian and Pacific neighbours will receive a blatant racist as our head of state. Imagine how the complexities of national governance would be managed by a simpleton whose guiding framework is "common sense". Imagine a science portfolio run under the whims of Malcolm 'Screwloose Lautrec' Roberts, the conspiracy theory embracing, anti-science, homuncular equivalent of RFK Jnr. As British PM, Liz Truss crashed the UK economy in under 50 days. Market panic wiped billions out of the UK economy, sent the British pound plunging to an all-time low against the US dollar, and pushed UK pension funds to the edge of collapse. Pauline Hanson's reduction of our economy to smoking ruins would take a couple of months longer given she has no economic plans whatsoever. Aggrieved voters are seeking anti-establishment alternatives amid cost-of-living pressures and growing economic uncertainty, but ours is a country too timid to stand on its own two feet and become a republic. Do you really believe such a country will endorse someone with the intellect of a carrot to run the place? Oh, hang on...gotta run. There's an elephant trampling my tomatoes The more mature among us has seen this goat rodeo before. Joh For Canberra In early 1987, the "Joh for PM" push was attracting around 20% support in national opinion polls. Some reports from the time even suggested support as high as 35% in certain surveys A Newspoll from February 6–8, 1987, revealed that 60% of voters believed a Bjelke-Petersen–Andrew Peacock ticket would be more likely to win the federal election than the existing Coalition leadership of John Howard and Ian Sinclair The campaign backfired spectacularly. Spooked voters outside of Queensland backed the Australian Labor Party to prevent Bjelke-Petersen from holding the balance of power. Bob Hawke won the 1987 election with a substantially increased majority.

A rising tide that will sink the Libs "This is fine." The shit that happened has floated back into frame. Tones is back! What was predicted has come to pass. Kiss O'Death, or Tone Deaf as he's known in some circles, has been elected unopposed as President of the Lying Nasty Party. Abbott is emblematic of the Libs - a 68 year old male, a political failure, a RWNJ soundly rejected by his electorate, a condescending sexist, a technophobe, a biblical literalist and a wrecker. Who better to repair the fortunes of his forsaken party? The greatest threat to the Libs and Nats is One Nation - the party of grievance and dissent, a repository for the anger of the rubes who were abandoned by the Nats in favour of billionaire mining interests and of the disaffected urban bogans who cheer on the ginger whinger who has consistently voted against their interests. Abbott believes validating the resentments of the populist right will bring them back into the L/NP fold. Instead, he is giving them permission to vote for One Nation. Abbott is adored in the RWNJ ecosphere as "the best opposition leader we've ever had". In opposition he prosecuted a 'just say no' campaign of blanket negativity and disparagement, disregarding merit and national interests in favour of constant conflict. And he carried it over into government. Defined by what he was against, his greatest achievements were tearing down the accomplishments of others. It's easy to oppose, harder to have ideas of your own. As a hard-core born-to-ruler Abbott believes in an immutable, God-ordained hierarchy where he and his patronising ilk form the upper echelon, ceding status only to royalty and the Vatican (the woke Leo XIV excepted I suspect), and there is no bastardry that is out of bounds for restoring and maintaining that arrangement. The beatings will continue until morale improves: “We need to break the something-for-nothing, entitlement mindset that is so corrosive of societies’ morale...” Tony Abbott, in a 2025 speech to the International Democracy Union. Abbott is on a ≈ $300k p.a. obligation-free, indexed pension for life + travel, office and support perks. Abbott's agenda is no secret. A focus on "preserving traditional values, national identity, strong borders" and promoting nuclear/fossil fuel/anti-climate mitigation. It's Peter Dutton’s agenda + the rescinding of industrial relations protections. Bernard Keane: "...the Liberal future Abbott thinks will be a winner is Dutton plus WorkChoices". When Tony Abbott was elected PM by his party the Libs had 44 metropolitan seats. They now have nine. Only one of their seats on the east coast has coastal views and none front Sydney Harbour. The bourgeoisie fled for the exits in previous Tory strongholds in Melbourne, zero seats are directly held by the Libs within the greater Brisbane area and they hold one each in metropolitan Adelaide and Perth. 57% of Australians reside in major metropolitan areas - yet now with bugger all representation in the Liberal party room. The Lib's response to their existential crisis: Talking heads - Rhodes To Nowhere The Liberal Party is 'under new management’ declared Abbott. Two old school tie, privileged products of their cloistered orbit within Gothic sandstone grandeur, ritual, robes and incense. There was some concession to diversity - Abbott is an alumnus of St Ignatius' College, Riverview while Taylor was educated at The King's School, Parramatta. A further lurch to the right and further alienation of 86% of voters who do not identify as Right¹ is their plan for electoral redemption? Abbott's attack dog style is to be unleashed, salted with warmed-over MAGA-ish jingoism - "That's what we are, the freedom party ... but above all else, we are the patriot party, which is why at our best, we should be absolutely unbeatable." Stir in some appeals to the antediluvians and dog-whistling to the racist fringe - "As Liberals, we cherish freedom, we respect tradition, but above all else we love our country." In a clear appeal to the cookers, sovereign citizens, neo-nazis and flag-shaggers who fled the Libs to back One Nation Abbott declared that the party’s job was to lead a “people’s revolt”, profess their monopoly on patriotism and refuse to stand in front of the Aboriginal or Torres Strait Islander flags. The mean and nasty is to be dialled up. The bogeyman of fanciful crises, hyperbolic accusations of imminent civilisation collapse at the hands of the demonic forces of Labor, unions, greenies and the woke will be invoked accompanied by the performative outrage of Murdoch's muckers. Those who also welcome Tones back are Labor and the independents. Oh, and Pauline. Bumping uglies ¹Left | Right | Out How voters perceive their own politics and the relative positions of political parties in a left/right ideological space. An Accent Research and RedBridge Group report. Figure 2. What exactly is Tony Abbott playing at? Christopher Warren, Crikey ($) 11 May, 2026 "Tony Abbott is the closest person the Liberals have to a Pauline Hanson figure. With his expanding influence, could we see a return to politics? Or did he never really leave?"

Should we have a new flag? And if we should, what designs should we consider? Aussie patriotism is not the boastful, jingoistic, ubiquitous flag-waving of Americans. Our most cringeworthy manifestation of national pride is the egregious "Aussie Aussie Aussie oi oi oi!" And like our flag that is not even original, being a corruption of the British rugby chant "Oggy Oggy Oggy oi oi oi". When we wave our flag it's for special occasions; and that brings me to a secondary reason for a change. Our flag has been hijacked by the loopy right - toothless, tattooed hordes of bellicose bogans and neo-nazis draped in our national emblem, the self-righteously religious, RWNJs and far-right fascists. It's a sad day when the sight of your own national flag evokes misgivings about the reasons for its display. The primary reason for a change though is that, dear Old Blighty, it's time. Your flag is wonderful - a great, inspiring design - so you can have it back. We're moving on. Should we have a new flag? I was undecided until Jerry Seinfeld tipped me over the edge with his quip - "Nice! England at night." But we should change only when we have an inspiring, thoughtful alternative - and there are some truly awful ideas out there. What are the options? "Ausflag is an apolitical, non-profit organisation seeking to secure the popular support of the Australian people for the adoption of a truly Australian flag. " Alternative flag designs are solicited by Ausflag and are shown on their web site. A very few of these designs are worth considering. The others range from hilarious through horrendous to hideous. So here are my rules for a new flag: No green. Green is a horrible colour for a flag, i don't care that our national colours are green and gold. The Brazilian flag is dreck - mostly due to the horrid green. The best designed flags never have green. Retain some link with the past - keep the blue background. 3 colours - max. No kangaroos, no emus, no boomerangs, no Uluru. It'll look like a souvenir tea towel. Stylised animals make for great logos, not great national flags. We are not Australia Inc. (provided we vote the Libs out before they complete their agenda). The KISS Principle. The simplest solution is always best. But a few horizontal or vertical stripes shows no imagination. Some offerings on the other hand look like the kindy kids have been let loose with an old Women's Weekly, bunny rabbit scissors and a bottle of Klag - a bit of this, some of that, throw that in.... No Aboriginal flag. It's theirs - let's not steal it from them; let them keep something FFS! No Eureka flag. It's a great design with historical context but it, like our current flag, has been hijacked by fringe loonies and red necks. Some submissions to Ausflag From the You've Got To Be Kidding folder An astronomical impossibility. Tall Aussie cricketer strides to the crease for a day-night match. Shelter shed wall at the paintball park. 126 bald men gathered around a camp fire. Wally did a burn-out in his ute down in the dusty creek bed last night. A dead kangaroo; killed in a meteor shower. A kangaroo farting pixie dust Someone blasted a hole in my Liechtenstein flag with a shot gun. A nocturnal Homer Simpson lurking behind the back fence. A smiley face x Pablo Picasso I have little doubt that whoever came up with this shocker has green hair and a unicorn tattoo on their arse. I was strolling along the beach when i got kidnapped by 5 alien spaceships. From the good, sensible design folder . Minimal change, maximum effect. The winner unless a better one comes along. A bit too close to the Finnish flag for comfort but a nice, neat design with cues from the Eureka flag. Reverse the colours? Vexicological trivia. Torres Straight Islands While the Aboriginal flag is an example of good design the same can't be said of the Torres Straight Islander flag which brings to mind a ​plumber with trademark bum crack, head under the sink, hitting his thumb with a hammer. Which US state has the Union Jack on its flag? Hawaii

Taxonomy is the practice of categorizing and naming of species. The official scientific name of an organism consists of its Genus and its Species Identifier, for example Corvus corax for crows, Homo sapiens for humans and Homo phobias for Lyle Shelton of the Australian Christian Lobby. Taxonomies are useful for understanding the relationships between species and their behaviours so I am somewhat surprised that there has been no scientific classification of the Tory family of organisms given the devastating affect they have had on the environment. In the absence of such I have drafted my own take on Tories which perhaps the boffins can finesse with further studies. The Tory family is believed to have branched off from hominids at about the time money was invented. Whether sea shells or bit coins, money provided a valuable evolutionary tool to those creatures who were prepared to use it to advantage themselves at the expense of others - Darwinism in action. Tories are great believers in the survival of the wealthiest. Note: Tories are not endemic to Australia. They are common also in the UK (Tory bloviatus) and the USA (Tory magamentalis). Two sub-families form the Australian grouping: Tory avariciousi and Tory yokelensis. Avariciousi is found in urban areas while yokelensis' natural habitat is the countryside. They have been known to interbreed, producing rather bizarre hybrids known as Darians and Clarissas, identifiable by their lack of a chin and their fondness for chinos. The best time for Tory spotting is when they gather together in the Australian Capital Territory each year to gorge on taxpayers' money and drink themselves to stupefaction - the gutters of Kingston and Manuka are ideal places for Tory watching. Trivia: We Tory watchers call ourselves twatchers. There are some commonalities across the genera and species that comprise the Tory family: an aversion to light, their calls of "labor labor labor & look over there", a staggering incompetence, an insatiable appetite for money (other people's) and a beligerent hostility when cornered. In a strange twist of devolution they are cold blooded. As with Darwin's finches from the Galapagos Islands they have evolved into various genera, a process that sped up noticeably upon the appearance in 1996 of Rattus fabricatus, commonly known as the lying rodent. The lying rodent is thought to have bred with Beehive ridiculousii - the lumpen Bronnysaurus Bishopii from Sydney's northern beaches whose Spakfilla features and red-lipsticked rictus made it look as if it was 3 days late for its own funeral. Rattus fabricatus Beehive ridiculousii Warringai wreckus The offspring from the coupling of fabricatus and ridiculousii is Warringai wreckus colloquially known as the feral friar who has an appearance similar to the early hominids. Covered in hair with an ape-like gait and a staccato cackle it resurrected rumours of the legendary yowie. It is now thought to be extinct. A creature that is on the brink of extinction - the agrarian bloodsucker (Barnabus rortii) is found in the northern tablelands of NSW rummaging through the wheelie bins of Tamworth public houses after dark. It has an easily recognisable call - "caaaarp, caaaaarp", a stumbling gait, gelatinous white thighs, fetid breath, bulging eyes, florid facial features resembling a baboon's backside and teeth like a leper's toes. It was displaced from its Canberra mating grounds by the bobble-headed booby (no-one can remember its proper name) from the Riverina region whose comatose demeanor is often mistaken for a constant state of hibernation. The booby has recently learned to walk on 2 legs. The most prominant example of Tory avariciousi is Happi-clappus mammonitis - the smirking tit. Mammonitis is a migratory specimen, flying to Pacific islands in the Australian summer & only returning when the heat reaches all the way to Hawaii. Mammonitis marks its territory with its own excrement and habitually displays both thumbs in a gesture that is taken to mean "how good are these? I just took 'em outta me own arse". One species known for its aversion to light is Dodgi asfukkus, or the black angus. The natural habitat for this species is large holes in the ground and dead native grasslands. The black angus also frequents the Cayman Islands where it stashes its reserves of money for leaner times. The black angus's call is a loud "ka-ching". The red gladys, also known as the purple flyer is an introduced species from Hong Kong. The red gladys was released into the wealthy suburbs of Melbourne after being bred in captivity by the Chinese Communist Party who hope it will spread its genes throughout the Tory avariciousi family while it distracts them with wads of cash. The screeching shrew is from the west coast and is characterised by a helmeted crest on its head, not dissimilar to that on a cassowary, and with a shrill call that peels paint - "oil noime noimes". The screeching shrew has other similarites to the cassowary - it's shy, hiding from the AFP & behind whiteboards, yet is vicious when cornered. Nobody has witnessed the mating habits of the screeching shrew and nobody wants to. We'll simply leave it as rumours that it prefers the 'reverse cow-girl'. Kipfler autocratus, the potato-headed boob, is known to become aroused in the presence of dark uniforms and semi-automatic weapons (evident from a slight upward movement of the left side of its mouth on its otherwise inert features). It's best to approach autocratus dressed in civvies. When out of sight it is believed that autocratus likes to adorn itself in a gimp mask and neck-to-ankles, crotchless black latex accessorised with a riding crop. This Taxonomy is a work in progress. There are many other species yet to be covered, including those of the related family Corporatus rapaciousii with which the Tories have formed a symbiotic relationship in order to steal water, poison the atmosphere, pollute the oceans, destroy habitats and share sun beds with on the French Riviera. It's difficult to get direct involvement from the species as they resist the science of evolution so this is an observational exercise and there's only one of me. * * * * * This post is also published by the Australian Independent Media Network.

What would Tony do? Setting the Tone for the demise of the Libs Tony Abbott once hyperbolically described his stint in the big, green PM chair as the "Abbott era", as if his mercifully brief two years formed a dynasty or a significant layer in the political strata. A more fitting description is '2IC in the Credlin-Abbott bozozoic interregnum'. But Abbott is still admired in the RWNJ ecosystem because he is steeped in RWNJ orthodoxy - wealth as virtue, climate denial, culture wars, sexism and racism. Abbott's fall at the 2019 election was put down to a failure on the part of the electorate to appreciate the virtues of a paternalistic troglodyte. Tories are not given to introspection hence their existential crisis caught them by surprise when Labor, the Greens and progressive independents routed the bastards in 2022. When once blue-ribbon Lib seats abandoned them and turned to more progressive independents these mugs argued it was because the Tories were insufficiently rabid. Such is the logic of the swivel-eyed loonies from the right. Now they want Tones back. The best thing to ever happen to Abbott was Scott Morrison - 'worst ever PM' became a contestable title that gives Abbott a bit of wriggle room. As a once reliable, now disillusioned Tory base fled for the exits this is the man the Liberal Party proposes as its federal president. The organizational wing, headed by the President, is responsible for pre-selecting candidates and promoting party philosophy. An Old Testament technophobe is to be their wise sage and venerable counsel. It's not certain that Abbott would lobby for a return to the teletype or the codpiece but it cannot be discounted. "[Angus] Taylor wants Abbott in the job...so that he can inject energy and ideas into the party." SMH 8 May 2026 Angus Taylor's Tony Abbott tribute band, Rhodes To Nowhere, seems destined to hasten the Liberal Party’s slide to minor-party status by embracing the feral friar's carping negativity and his drive to the fringe by squabbling with One Nation over ownership of the grievance/oi oi oi/bigot/cooker vote. “I’m confident that the leadership team of Angus Taylor and Jacinta Nampijinpa Price has the conviction and courage to make a real contest of the next election.” Tony Abbott. 11 May, 2025 “In any capacity at all [I] will be striving to make Angus Taylor Australia’s 32nd prime minister.” Kiss O'Death Abbott The humiliating massacre of the Libs and Nats at the Farrer by-election has clearly demonstrated the efficacy of that strategy. Did that finally teach them a lesson? You be the judge: Deputy douche Jane Hume explained that the Liberals lost Farrer because the voters were “angry at Albo” despite the fact Labor did not contest the seat. She also refused to rule out a One Nation alliance. Matt Sooty Canavan’s “We are back!” with the Nationals’ fourth placing at <10% of the vote. Murdoch muck spreader and Tory stooge Andrew Bolt who claims the defenestration of the Tories was a humiliation for "the Left". The plummy-vowelled sago pudding in a suit that is Lord Alexander Downer argued the Liberal Party ought to learn lessons from One Nation’s stance on immigration and race. Speaking of Curly Downunder: “Was a more conceited piece of fairy floss ever put on a stick?” Paul Keating on Alexander Downer. This is the Tory meritocracy at work. "Very much opposed to quotas”...they are “contrary to the merit and what should be at the heart of our Liberal conservative philosophy”. Two failed, past their use by dates, old, white guys battling it out over ownership of the Liberal Party's demise (the average Australian is a 37yr old woman, the average Liberal is a 70yr old man). The Liberals have behaved like a protest party. They are becoming as relevant as a TV test pattern Cathy Wilcox. The SMH Golding. The SMH A decade of dog-whistles and a decade of lost voters. The Coalition’s natural voter just became Australia’s largest diaspora. It doesn’t vote for them. Kos Samaras, The New Daily. 7 May, 2026

George Washington's last great experiment may get voluntarily flushed down a gold-plated toilet A syphilitic gobshite, charlatan, rapist and traitor We Australians are all well accustomed to Americans, but they are not like you and me. They don't pronounce the 'h' in herb. They call it gas but it's a liquid. Tuna fish. WTF? Cow mammal? They live within walking distance of a school shooting. Guns and Jesus. Jesus was a white American BTW. The NRA. Wealth = virtue. More = better. Large, jumbo or godzilla-size? The last hold out of imperial measurements. MM/DD/YY. They don't know what communism is but they know they don't like it. 98 icecream flavours. Frothed chocolate chip cookie dough lattes. Marshmallow infused breakfast cereal. The flag. Everywhere. The World Series (sic). The widespread deployment of middle initials. Child beauty pageants. Ew! Visiting foreign countries wherein to search out Starbucks and McDonalds. The electoral college. "Thank you for your service." Joe Exotic. Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Bobert. Wonton killings, gazpacho police, peach tree dishes, Jewish space lasers and hand jobs in movie theatres. Their left wing is right wing and their right wing is an amoral, swivel-eyed fever swamp of nasty idiocy (see previous point). The USA comprises diverse citizenries but generalisations can be generally true. How else other than shared nationalistic quirks to explain the wide embrace of the grotesqueries of Trump, the MAGAe and the sewage farm that is the GOP? "Because fuck you. We are 'merkins. USA! USA! USA!" Americans are so inculcated with American exceptionalism they think everyone else wants to be them. There's no need to immerse oneself in American culture to recognise that they're fervent subscribers to their own hand over heart jingoism. Ronald Reagan believed that to be born in America was to win life’s lottery, conveniently over-looking the vast disparities between the rich and the poor - the top 1% of households in the United States now hold 32.3% of the country's wealth while the bottom 50% hold 2.6%. John Steinbeck once observed that socialism never took root in America because the poor see themselves not as an exploited proletariat but as temporarily embarrassed millionaires. But for too many the shiny, red Mustang in the double garage that symbolises the American dream has now become a rust-riddled, clapped out '76 Ford-O-Matic Country Squire abandoned in a casino car park and is to blame. Innovation vs entrepreneurism is wherein they possess a robust belief that inventiveness is a distinctly American version of capitalism yet the industrial revolution was British, the first man in space was a Russian, it was German Nazis what got 'em to the moon, Alexander Graham Bell was a Scot as was John Logie Baird. Einstein and the automobile were incubated in Germany, the first known artificial form of refrigeration was demonstrated by William Cullen at the University of Glasgow, Michael Faraday was English, Nikola Tesla a Serb, Tim Berners-Lee an Englishman. You get the drift. What Americans excel at is claiming credit while making a buck in the process ala Thomas Edison. But they do cultivate a culture where creativity can thrive, imported or no, good or bad. "The US ranks No. 1 in the world on research", and highly for "literature, theatre, film, music and art". It is heavily represented in the rankings of the world's best universities yet "UNESCO reports adult literacy in the US at 86 per cent, while Australia, New Zealand, the United Kingdom, Canada, Ireland, France, Germany, Italy and Japan are at 99 per cent.¹ ¹Barry Jones. The Saturday Paper The self-proclaimed beacon of democracy, occupying the moral high ground, was founded on the principle that privileged, rich men shouldn't pay taxes. The land of the free scores 83/100 on the U.S.-based non-governmental organization Freedom House's world freedom index . (Australia scores 95/100.) They confuse influence and power with character - might makes right, yet the more thoughtful are capable of introspection: The Newsroom - America is not the greatest country in the world anymore "The world's greatest democracy could collapse due to a reality TV game show host, after one political party lost its sanity following the election of a black President." Unknown The personification of the country's worst characteristics is a bloated, deluded, flatulent, big noting, grifting, lying, cheating, sexual predator and vulgarian. This despot-fawning lickspittle, a convicted felon, a treasonous spiv, an orange-stuccoed fraud at the pointy end of his feculent spawn's crime spree is a viable contender for the most influential role on the planet. To commemorate Independence Day 2024 this faithless Republican nominee for POTUS went on air to tout his $59.99 God Bless the USA Bible™ (free copy of the consitution included. He has read neither). “When fascism comes to America it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a Bible.” Attributed to Sinclair Lewis Whether bloviating to a tawdry arriviste audience and their duck-lipped, silicon-titted trophy shags at his Kitsch-O-Rama sur la mer golf motel/stolen document repository or playing his invisible accordion to an effluvium of grinning thralls and occupants of the upper right corner of the fuckwit quadrant he's lauded by these fools to his last imbecilic gibberings. He says he “wants to be able” to override the Constitution to “pick” when elections are held, he calls for televised military tribunals for his political opponents and the red-capped, bovine espousers of America as the best kind of democracy wave their placards and shit on their flag. The tangerine man knows boosterism is a vote winner. MAGA is where the USA is the greatest at everything should the woke, radical left anti-fascist fascist Marxists be excluded as they indulge in unfettered arson of what once was a nation they could be proud of. Ooohkay. "The U.S will never be destroyed from the outside, if we lose our freedoms it's because we have destroyed ourselves from within." Abraham Lincoln Perhaps one double cheeseburger too many will have him drooling and shitting his pants in a sunny corner of the recreation room at the Rainbow's End Assisted Living facility for Enfeebled Fucktards rather than wiping the fried chicken grease from his tiny fingers onto the Oval Office curtains once more. I believe that a decent America will assign this crime magnate to the land fill bucket at history's liposuction clinic. However Trumpism may live on and that's a whole other story. WARNING: If you click the like icon or add a comment you will simply be encouraging my rantings.