What if...
- 20 hours ago
- 7 min read
...a consequential number of Australians are MAGA-level nasty, ignorant and deluded?
Imagine the Ginger Whinger wielding real power. Imagine the consequences.
As of 28 August 2026, Pauline Hanson explicitly framed her objectives as getting One Nation into government and getting Anthony Albanese's Labor government out of office. Is that fanciful or is it feasible?
One Nation is flypaper for the gormless—crackpots, village idiots, racist uncles, cookers, rubes and oiks (and Queenslanders—but I repeat myself)—who make up its traditional base of around 5–7% nationally.
One Nation's brand is 'champion of anti-immigration'. Code for 'racist'. Its genesis was Hanson's strident indignation at attempts to address systemic disadvantage experienced by Indigenous Australians. That morphed into Yellow Peril V2 ("I believe we are in danger of being swamped by Asians") thence to "How can you tell me there are good Muslims?".
That's her foundational appeal - the politics of whiny grievance and resentment built upon bigotry.
Hanson's opposition to immigration is not about sustainability or attracting desirable skills and talents - it is hostility to multiculturalism and particular ethnic and religious groups (“It’s not the country that I grew up in”). She is an obdurate, opinionated scold and a shrew with, as the Scots' idiom goes, 'a face like a dog licking pish from a nettle'. She is stupid, she is ignorant. And she's as gullible as a MAGA with an expired pick-up truck registration and a pair of gold-coloured Trump sneakers - a patsy for billionaires you could say. But lately her popularity has boomed. So, someone has been tuning her piano, polishing the stool.
“She is weapons-grade stupid, but she is adept at making crowds angry,” however the crowd “turned off” when she attempted to prosecute “anything remotely serious”. An attendee about Hanson at the Dubbo Bush Summit, August 2026 as reported by Crikey
One Notion has tapped into the angsty zeitgeist, extending its reach beyond its low information, rusted-on base while disguising its core, odious ideology. Immigration → population growth → housing pressure → rents → infrastructure pressure → congestion → declining living standards. That's a logical progression but it's too considered for a simpleton like Hanson.
ON has learned to launder cultural grievance through material anxiety. Whoever is guiding this will need to go beyond Hanson's simplistic hit parade of racially-based grievances and performative rage-baiting. Protest voting in Farrer and now WA's Secret Harbour is one thing. Endorsing a moron like Hanson for a position of real power is something else.
No doubt many will stick with One Nation, particularly given the spectacular self-harm being indulged in by the Libs at national and state levels. And then there's Albanese's lack of judgement. It was underlined by his tryhard, cringeworthy ScoMo moment of "oooh, boobies, hurr hurr" on a smut-branded podcast. It comes through too frequently on matters of import and it's further damaging his reputation and Labor's by association. Also, Labor's complacency is a gift to ON, its cause being threefold:
they hold a huge majority,
they assume they'll inherit most centrist, Green and other lefty preferences, and
they have an expectation that the right-wing vote will be split between Libs, Nats, ON, Clive Palmer and the fiscally conservative independents.
The Secret Harbour result is what happens when economic anger goes unanswered. A once safe Labor seat with demographics outside ON's standard catchment puts the lie to scenarios 1 and 2 - Labor's national majority is wide but it's not deep. The third scenario won't help Labor if the Tories are by then reduced to an annoying background thrum - a process that is well underway, helped along by their craven bestowing of credibility upon ON through imitation and playing footsies with preference swapping. Liberal preferences secured Secret Harbour for ON.
Oz has its share of shitweasles and the befuddled. MAGA does not have a monopoly on the nasty, the ignorant or the deluded—here it has its brand imitators. The MAGA patois is being deployed (“patriots”, “truth-tellers”, “authenticity—He/she tells it like it is”, “Marxist, commie, Nazi lefttards”) as is the militaristic language of “insurgency”, “force” and “terrorism” which together construct a narrative that frames minority groups as threats. "Immigration" is Hanson and co.'s Trumpist/Faragist nudge, nudge, wink, wink recruitment strategy to reach those who are not outright racists but are legitimately concerned about the country's rapidly changing demographics. It's working.
Is it working enough though? Despite the prognostications of some political cognoscenti I do not for one moment believe that this country will ever put Hanson into any position of significant consequence - particularly the prime ministership. She is a clownish naïf - out of her depth, thin-skinned and paranoid, with no ability to comprehend nuance, complexities and eventuality. She is entirely comfortable that her ignorance trumps the experts with their fancy evidence, facts and science. "To the poorly educated and disaffected “expertise” sounds like a code word for condescension"*.
Science: "The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existence. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvellous structure of reality..." Albert Einstein.
Hanson: "Only still allow to the Chinese to come in there the belting road projects the ports that they're building and that's like they've said to us up you we're actually going to just take the Chinese and have them here." National Press Club speech.
Hanson fans may rationalise her gibberings as authenticity (which, ironically, it is. She's an authentic idiot) but even the semi-sentient can recognise the implications.
Almost three out of every four ON voters say politicians “usually look after themselves”, yet they believe Hanson has their interests at heart despite her obsequience to, and 𝗉̶𝖺̶𝗅̶𝗆̶ ̶𝗀̶𝗋̶𝖾̶𝖺̶𝗌̶𝗂̶𝗇̶𝗀̶ largesse from billionaire Gina The Hutt, and her open admiration for the most venal and corrupt politician on the planet:
“I like Trump. I like his policies and I think we’re on the same page.”
Hanson at Mar-a-Lago CPAC, 2025
The orange Rape Van Winkle is anathema in Australia.
The appeal of Hanson's supposed authenticity will wane as her embrace of the vulgar rich at the expense of her base becomes too brazen to excuse. Imagine Hanson in power and Big Vag cashing in the IOUs - noting that that egregious, muumuued person of girth has suggested surrendering land in Townsville to the Israelis for testing bombs and rockets and donating islands to Elon Musk. for rocket launches. Donating. Giving away. Free islands. To the world's richest man. From which to make even more money*. (Bring forth the tumbrils.)
*Townsville Bush Summit 18 June 2026.
Keep in mind that identifying any detailed or substantiated ON policy is like arm-wresting custard, but any contemplation of the implications of Hanson in power needs to consider many scenarios. Here's a few:
Imagine a global financial crisis, even a depression, brought about by Trump's Iranian misadventure spiralling further out of control. Barnaby Cockfondle, rural accountant, limp faller and enthusiast of the haddock pastie, would likely be the treasurer/finance minister in any ON administration. You do the maths.
Accelerating natural disasters, being witnessed globally, do not require imagination. What does is homuncular climate change denier and conspiracy theorist Malcolm Grassy Noel Roberts as science minister. Further investments in clean energy will be kyboshed, energy costs will skyrocket as decrepit coal power is kept on life support, disaster recovery and mitigation blows the budget, and that wizened little prick will continue to pretend that nuclear power is the answer. 20 years to come online, and requiring underwriting with public money. Hanson has said two nuclear reactors should be built on the east coast, which is at odds with her party's official policy.
Hanson, quoted on high CO₂ emissions: "a million underwater volcanos releasing the carbon dioxide," (a cause for something that doesn't exist apparently).
≈1,000 potentially active submarine volcanoes are thought to exist worldwide. Human emissions are up to 270 times greater than all combined global volcanic emissions.
Also Hanson—after a brief snorkel on the Great Barrier reef she disputed scientists' warnings of its vulnerability to climate change and claimed it is in robust good health along its entire 2,300km length. "We can't have these lies put across by people with their own agendas," she said vacuously and without a hint of self-awareness.¹
Consider Defence - typically thought of as a right-wing strength and always the biggest budget item. Defence expenditure is focused on high-tech, complex systems and equipment oversighted by government. "Is it true that pump-jet submarines can only stay underwater for 20 minutes?". Hanson, in Senate Estimates asked this of a Rear Admiral who heads up the submarine program. This is the fuckwit some think can lead the country.
Hanson is a control freak, leading a party of freaks and weirdos.
Who can imagine that querulous bleating conveying any authority or gravitas whatsoever?
Who can envision her default mode of bitching and moaning in any interactions with heads of state, captains of industry and global leaders?
Who would not be embarrassed at the thought of her representing Australia at international forums?
Who would think this whiny, fried fish retailer could hold her own and protect Australia's best interests in any dealings with hard-arsed autocrats, kleptocrats or psychopaths such as Trump, Putin and the tech bro oligarchs?
Most know it's beyond her. She knows it's beyond her. She's been indulged by the corporate media for her entertainment value but reality is dawning.
The very notion of Hanson in power is alarming. But the person most fearful at the prospect of Pauline Hanson becoming prime minister is Pauline Hanson.
*One Nation’s battler lie unravels. Urban Wronski
¹Scientists discovered chlorofluorocarbons were bad for the ozone, countries believed them, the Montreal Protocol was signed, and CFC use fell by 99.7%, leading to the stabilization of the ozone layer, perhaps the greatest example of global cooperation in history.
Brilliant description of Pooleeeen and her party of dick heads GG, you should post your writings on fb
You have excelled yourself with this piece of great journalism. The so-called media and even the ABC have been pussyfooting around the O.N. challenge.