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Apologies to Dr Seuss There's something wrong with Herr Shikeltuber Green Eggs & Ham - Dr Seuss. Spud's puddin' - moir.com.au “Every instinct in this bloke’s body, every calculation, is about how he can divide the country. It shows this bloke’s not fit to run a bath, let alone Australia” Jason Clare, Minister for Education In a Trumpian world of normalised grotesqueries the Overton Window has skewed significantly rightward making it difficult to rank Right-Wing Scum-Bags in accordance with their relative levels of vileness. Is fascism worse than facilitating mass shootings via lax gun laws? Is stealing from a kids' cancer charity as bad as diverting $billions in public money to mega-rich pals? Does Dick Cheney's endorsement of Kamala Harris make him any less of a cunt? The RWSBs all contribute to the stink of a shared, amoral ordure where the consequences of their malevolence is impossible to fully quantify so rating them is mostly futile. Nevertheless the orange-stuccoed, putrescent depravity-stuffed hotdog skin that is Donald Trump, it could be reasonably argued, is the quintessence of the type and the standard by which all the others should be judged. A recitation of the full catalogue of his flaws would dampen the vibe at a riot of English football hooligans - it's the dumbfounding effect that media stooges cynically exploit to dilute his endless outrages as quirky but unexceptional. It is a given that the GOP in the US and the Tories in the UK are power-hungry sociopaths and born-to-rule prigs, corrupt chancers, flight risks and sex predators. At a local level, assessing where P.Duddy the aspiring tinpotato of Oz sits on the global spectrum of odiousness is a fraught exercise when his inclusion with mass murderers and crackpot billionaire oligarchs could be considered hyperbolic. But consider for a moment that forty-six per cent of Coalition voters back the orange rapist's POTUS candidacy ( Lowy Institute poll, page 14 ), - a shocking stat, so we should then ponder the ecosystem in which Duddy would thrive to get a better handle on the threat he poses and the extremism he'll exploit if given the chance. Javier Bardem as Anton Chigurh - No Country For Old Men. From the get-go Hairless Hitler the kitten strangler has been an active participant in the treasure hunt of grift, the dysfunction and indolence and the BAU cruelty that characterise RWSB governments everywhere. Lacking any charm or perspicacity he could believably be drawing upon the Anton Chigurh character for inspiration; supplemented of course by his own inherent talent for hate-mongering, punching down, bigotry and malice that will establish the despotic tone of any possible Duddy regime. Duddy's Trumpification of auspol continues FauxMo's cringe-worthy fellating of the orange hosenscheißer, but less blatantly given Donny's current status as sundowning grandpa and prisoner-in-waiting (and the Thug's aversion to even a hint of homoeroticism). But let's see where we're at. Appealing to bigotry, ignoring facts? Scapegoating migrants? The Trumpers' dialling it to 11 in the US is reinforcement for Duddy's own prejudices. It's a natural fit. It develops from the shameless exploitation of the Tampa and children overboard infamies by John Howard the cryogenic Igor Mortis and is a comfortable filler for Duddy's own moral void. The duplicity of his Voice sabotage was a dry run - a test case for how palatable his overt racism will be. I can taste a bit of sick in the back of my throat. Outrage farming, manufacturing crises and the testing of the proles' tolerance for absurdism is in beta release locally - our trainer-wheeled Trumpies are not so stupid as to go full Dementadon ala “ Y our kid goes to school and comes home a few days later with an (transgender) operation. The school decides what’s going to happen with your child ” but they're pretty chill with Donny's porkies such as wind generators killing whales. BTW, a full list of Coalition MPs concerned about whale well-being due to ocean drilling and mining is available here . I've been sensing pumpkin-coloured themes on many things Duddy for some time - Duddy - " I've always seen parliament as a disadvantage for sitting governments ." Trump - threatens to jail adversaries in escalating rhetoric ahead of the candidates' debate. Trump's stolen election? Duddy's accusation that the AEC was "rigging" the Voice referendum. Culture wars - the imported, facile "woke mind-virus" sledge to cover any outbreak of compassion or empathy. Blatant lying, dissembling and misinformation? If called out, double down and fill the zone with shit. “We now see evidence, Mr Speaker, that the Chinese Communist Party, the Chinese government, has also made a decision about who they’re going to back in the next federal election, Mr Speaker, and that is open and that is obvious, and they have picked this bloke as that candidate.” Duddy on Albanese, February 10, 2022 If Peter Dutton isn’t an outright liar, he’s a clear-eyed believer of his own untruths - Michael Bradley lined the prick up nicely in Crikey ($): " Former PM Scott Morrison lied constantly, but couldn’t hide the smug self-awareness that his resting smirk face betrayed. Opposition Leader Peter Dutton, by contrast, only has one face, and it always looks sincere. The trouble is that he says things that are objectively untrue, things he cannot possibly believe. He does so often, with increasing frequency and flagrancy. As with Trump, this presents the media with a big challenge. So far, they’re failing the test. " Dutton is a corpulent, embaldened Tony Abbott sans the red sluggos (take a moment to process that) with the same incessant negativity that the feral friar took into government. And we all saw how that worked out. Keep in mind the Libs preferred Scott Morrison to Dutton - he's that awful. At some point it will dawn on the Libs that they really need to trawl somewhere other than the discount bins to find their leaders. The RWSB biome encompasses genocidal murderer Netanyahu through to the masses of credulous rubes and dullards who willingly put their dicks in the chipper by cheering on the likes of Abbott, BoJo, Farage, Bolsinaro and JDVance; their conceits fed by the noisome duo of Murdoch and Musk, the most rapacious, mercenary media effluencers to ever befoul public discourse. The amorality of the wider corporate media cheersquad applies an asymmetric warfare - exploiting the higher standards that left leaning politics is held to for the $ clicks that cultivated offence can yield. Within the sack & pillage cohort Duddy enjoys the indulgence of a calorie indifferent Gina Rinehart, a bloated sack of avarice and inanity who seems to believe as per Elmo the space nazi that obscene inherited wealth is a reflection of wisdom and insight. It is inevitable that should the Gruppenfritter fall into the PMship his status as Big Vag's primary gofer is assured. Division is his modus operandi. National unity, concensus and social cohesion are anathema to this autocratic head kicker. Just how low Duddy will go will be revealed as the election draws nearer. But it's his embrace of the anonymous fossil fuel plunderers who know they are destroying the planet yet choose to do it anyway and his opportunistic exploitation of the genocidal murder of little kiddies in Gaza as a political wedge that sums up this POS. * * * * * 👍 Like, comment and share . Good reads: Yes, division is Dutton’s business model. But so is damaging national security.  Bernard Keane, Crikey ($). These 21st-century demagogues aren’t mavericks – they’ve repeated on us throughout history George Monbiot, The Guardian The Gruppenfritter bigged up his "not a racist" credentials by suggesting the Nazis weren't all bad, arguing that the Nazis had shame. According to The Thug the Nazis at least tried to cover up their genocide, the suggestion being that Nazis hid their crimes because they felt guilty, making them more moral than Hamas. Not a racist? You be the judge: "The Australian people don’t want to have officials out of Canberra jamming some sort of language code down their throat". That was his response to hate speech. “I don’t think people should be coming in from that war zone at all at the moment. It’s not prudent to do so and I think it puts our national security at risk.” On Gazans being given refuge while wrapped in an Australian scarf celebrating Olympians.  14th August 2024. "If the government is returned it will be in minority and "will include the Greens, it'll include green teals, it'll include Muslim candidates from western Sydney, it will be a disaster." Press conference, 4th July 2024 "At a time when we need to unite the country, this prime minister's proposal will permanently divide us by race," On the federal government's proposed Voice to Parliament He took a vague complaint against Bruce Pascoe, author of 'Dark Emu', suggesting he committed fraud, to the Australian Federal Police. It was dismissed. January 2020 "It’s going to mean that people who need medical services in Australia are going to be displaced from those services. Because if you bring hundreds and hundreds of people from Nauru and Manus down to our country, they are going to go into the health network, I don’t want to see Australians who are in waiting lines in public hospitals kicked off those waiting lines because people off Nauru and Manus are now going to access those health services." 1 March 2019 "The spotlight is given to people like Fraser Anning or like this senator [Faruqi]. The comments she’s made and the desire to extract some sort of political advantage or attention seeking out of this circumstance, I think is appalling." Drawing an equivalence between the comments of Senator Anning, who defended the Christchurch massacre and Senator Faruqi who condemned the government's rhetoric on the subject. Radio National, 18 March 2019 "I discriminate not on somebody's ethnic background, not on their religion, not on their country of origin, but on the fact that they have conducted themselves against the law, outside of the law." The Australian July 2018 "I do think on the information that I've seen, people do need help, and they need help from a civilized country like ours." On resettling whitee South African Farmers. Daily Telegraph, March 2018 "The reality is people (in Melbourne) are scared to go out at restaurants of a night time because they’re followed home by these gangs, home invasions, and cars are stolen and we just need to call it for what it is. Of course, it is African gang violence." Interview on 2GB, January 2018 "Somebody once said to me that the world’s biggest collection of Armani jeans and handbags up on Nauru waiting for people to collect when they depart." Interview on 2GB September 2017 "The reality is Malcolm Fraser did make mistakes in bringing some people in the 1970s and we're seeing that today. We need to be honest in having that discussion. There was a mistake made. Lessons from past migrant programs should be learnt for people settling in Australia today." Sky News November 2016 "They won't be numerate or literate in their own language, let alone English. These people would be taking Australian jobs, there's no question about that. For many of them that would be unemployed, they would languish in unemployment queues and on Medicare and the rest of it so there would be huge cost and there's no sense in sugar-coating that, that's the scenario." Sky, 16 May, 2016 “I don’t have any issue with what Wilson said frankly or his right to say it.” Endorsing Wilson Tuckey's comments that Aboriginal recognition a farce. 15 March 2010

Probably moir.com.au To identify what the abominable No Man is for, we have to filter out what he's against. From there you can extrapolate whether you are amongst the things he hates. That wooden, cadaverous demeanor is a veneer. Underneath it he's a testy prick. He's always angry. Fear and loathing are his tools of trade, a sock full of sand is his preferred persuader. He'd tear the wings off his kids' butterfly collection as practice. He'd gift them a 15 year old dog for Christmas so he'd not have to abandon it by Easter. He flatters himself that he's a leader but his befuddled disposition is the reveal - you can sense the dust bunnies floating by in the vaccuum behind his eyes. This bloke is no enigma, there's no mystery nor depth. He's an obtuse, incurious dullard and wowser, a bovine oaf, a head-kicker, a bruiser, a punisher and straightener. There's no grand plan, no imagination nor ambition beyond the realisation of his nastiness and the gratification of the ego of a hateful but otherwise unremarkable pissant. I doubt that he's even fully aware of all that he hates. Let us consider - "Lefty" and "woke" are his go-to pejoratives. "Inner-city elites" is a handy slur from the anti-elitist who heads a party of entitled, privately-schooled toffs, captains of industry and billionaire robber barons. With five investment properties and a salary of $432,239 p.a. he once billed us $23k for a jet to a Newscorp event sponsored by Gina Rinehart to talk about the cost of living crisis. Apparantly he's an egalitarian who can nevertheless indulge in white truffles with gavage-fattened foie gras canapes with Patagonian toothfish char-grilled over Wollomi pine woodchips and a cheeky Louis Roederer Cristal Brut at Big Vag's birthday extravaganza. Our man of the people also dines with a billionaire Indian steel magnate and is gifted objets d'art from foreign officials. Putting his Master Of Hypocrisy credentials to one side, if there's any calculation behind The Thug's hatefulness it would be the turning of the dial to orange. ' Vote for me because I hate the same people you do. ' Enmity trumps empathy. Every time. Racist demonisation of immigrants, while an inherent far-right ethos, is also a useful tool to desensitise us to other atrocities. Calculated assaults on the vulnerable and marginalised are reduced to the natural order of things, easing the path to greater evils. The ready targets of The Thug's dehumanisation are brownish toddlers, brownish adults (Indian mining nabobs excepted), Africans (unless they're white farmers), Muzzies, Lebs (not sure where he currently stands on wogs and dagos) and China - although he throttled back the Sinophobia when the Libs got a kicking in four marginal seats with large percentages of electors of Chinese heritage. The Thug would have us believe his gratuitous indifference to the mass slaughter of Gaza's children is because the disemboweled, headless tykes pulled from the rubble were likely Hamas operatives. They are disposable lives in service to his attempts to wedge Labor on immigration and an excuse for him to wave his favourite terrorist scare schtick. If anything exposes The Thug's effluviant character it is this. Not a monster ©. Kirrily Dutton When a politician equivocates about the mass murder of innocents then they’re telling you how they’d treat you if they could. Tony Abbott: " I crippled the NBN. " The Thug: " Phhht! " The sabotage of the Voice to Parliament is his defining achievement. It was an insult to Indigenous dignity, denying that their original inhabitants' status was deserving of recognition. It was a trial run of the palatability of his cuntedness vs Albo's naive trust in our better angels. It reinforced his belief that his hate and division is a winning play. He's a physical manifestation of tourettes - Frankenstein's lab fugitive, charisma-free and aesthetically unpleasant. He may laugh at the thought of refugees being poked with sticks through a wire mesh fence, chortle at Pacific Islands sinking beneath the waves and clench his butt cheeks to force a smile for the cameras but what he doesn't understand are irony or sagacity. Nipple clamps and a ball gag for a Friday night thrashing with a riding crop are the closest he'd ever get to having benign fetishes. One of Alan Moir's best. As aware as a Cheviot beach lifeguard, as marketable as a recycled Snowtown barrel, as reassuring as a bushwalk with Ivan Milat - this race-baiting sewer of hate and division is the best the Tories can offer? This...thing... is supposed to have national leadership appeal? The hate-monger has evident antipathies: Workers. Unions. Bipartisanship. Always leave open any oppotunity to divide. Saying sorry. Troublesome 10 year olds. Lock 'em up. Same sex marriage. Anti-discrimination laws. Rainbow socks. Net zero. Greenies. His war on the environment doesn't mean he hates all life on earth - simply that he's sceptical about much of its relevance to his own interests. Free speech. Yours. Frank and fearless advice - zero tolerance of inconvenient facts. Scrutiny. Criticism. Responsibility. This bloke left Home Affairs and Immigration in total chaos. Accountability. He's "... never a big fan of lawyers, or abstractions like the rule of law *  ..." Medicare. As health minister he cut $50 billion from hospitals, tried to introduce a $7 GP tax and secretly launched the Medicare Privatisation Task force. Your superannuation (but not his own). The Guardian, The Age, the SMH. The ABC, the AEC, the BoM, the CSIRO. *Fellow Tory elitist George Brandis. Billionaire mining magnates are the obvious objects of his affections and deference. Others getting a pass are the rabid racists and xenophobes, the easily frightened, the chronically stupid, Trumpers, eco vandals, Swedish au pairs and Murdoch's bin rummagers. Tame aborigines Jacinta NameYa Price and Uncle Tom Mundine should probably keep an eye on the bus schedule - their value has a finite shelf life. What about you? Are you brownish? Leftish or centrist? Are you fair-minded? Environmentally aware? Are you a poor, a migrant, a refugee? Are you now or have you ever been a member of a union? Are you indigenous, flamboyant, a public servant? Are you Sally McManus, Louise Milligan or Laura Tingle? Have you ever voted Labor, Green or Teal? Have you ever offered a down & outer a helping hand? Are you accepting of any of the above? If so, does he hate you? Yes, he probably does.

P.Duddy turns orange Making fascism great again . Image sources: ChronicalLive, AP Is the LN/P adopting GOP dirty deeds and agitprop and looking to the MAGAt for inspiration? Good times Malignant tuber P. Duddy is far more inclined to pluck Gina Rinehart's chin hairs than he is to openly lick the Orange Dementodon's earlobe à la Trump's fellow hosen scheisse Scooter Morrison. Overt suckholing of a foreign freebooter is not Duddy's style when the owner of said hole is an adjudicated rapist and convicted felon with poor sphincter control. The combed-over shitgibbon's place in Duddy's affections is more likely as litmus test for what he may be able to get away with if applied in an auspol context. Abbottesque negativism is the truncheon-headed thug's defining characteristic - it underpins the void where decency and integrity have gone to die. Duddy needs to be able to market that, hence orange tinged fuckery is being applied to the more traditional, deep-blue bastardry of Ol' Camphor Balls - the cryogenic John Howard. Hate, fear, division, manufactured outrage, migrants & refugees, the woke agenda, radical left elitists, the deep state, post-truth feels vs facts (tom8to/tomRto), whale-murdering windmill climate denialism, calumny...the shared ethos of a practicing criminal and an ex-copper from Queensland! Duddy has demonstrated a prediliction for hate, fear and division and a history of animosity to those with tinged complexions, particularly our indigenous folk. Behind the Clark Kent spectacles and the kiddy-scarring forced rictus there's the dim glow of an understanding of just how unpalatable he is to all but the white shoe brigade, moon units, protoNazis, flight risks, people who clap when the plane lands and the dumpster divers of Murdoch's turd-polishing rags. Disliking Dutton is as easy as slapping a duck but Trump's flagrant egregiousness affords Duddy cover for his own abuses which look defensible in comparison. The Tories watch Trump to learn how to tie a bow on a turd. And the tawdriness of their junk drawer politics, their recreational corruption, can be waved away - what's $532 million of dodgy deals with Paladin to run Manus Island, what's water theft or rampant boondoggles when the tangerine-stuccoed lunatic threatens Denmark as a means to steal Greenland's mineral wealth? Our embaldened wannabe PM has already tested the Trumpian waters to complement the L/NP's homegrown portfolio of outrage farming, culture wars, race baiting and assaults on clean energy by using the marketing cons of the only mob boss to ever inhabit the White House. If a career criminal can end up in the Oval Office, twice, there's gotta be some useful tips for an autocratic, boof-headed, cadaverous root vegetable and his Gestapotato stooges. “The Trump effect has made politics here more cynical, more angrily partisan, more culturally charged and overly politicised” Dr Nick Bryant. National Press Club. 20 Nov 2024 A strongman shtick has natural appeal to bullies like Trump and Duddy. A bloated, crepe-skinned, be-moobed pumpkin-coloured chubster can pull it off so surely it's a no-brainer for a lugubrious lump like Duddy who, in comparison, simply presents as the progenitive output of a gene-splicing experiment between Lurch and Uncle Fester. Well, OK, it's not about looks (obv.) but rather The Inquisition vibe - beligerence sold as integrity, intimidation as strength, victimisation of minorities as protecting the "silent majority". Psychologists have observed that when people see the world around them as dangerous, unpredictable and threatening it predisposes them to favour an autocratic leader who can be perceived as being able to maintain the safety of the group. So, as the election draws nearer expect Duddy's fear mongering to be dialled to ear-bleeding levels with the 'simple-solutions-to-complex-problems' marketing pitch favoured by populists everywhere ("Only I can save you!" / "Albo's a wuss!"). aaand there it is... SMH. January 11, 2025 Dutton says ‘strong’ leader needed to heal anxious, divided nation "Peter Dutton will hold his first election campaign-style rally on Sunday, launching a pitch to lead the nation with an attack on “weak” Prime Minister Anthony Albanese and a warning that Australia has become less safe, more pessimistic and divided under Labor." And we will see further weaponisation of Australia Day as the veggie patch prosecutes its culture wars and more denegration of trusted institutions will follow (AEC, CSIRO, BOM even the ICC but particularly the ABC - collectively the "Deep State"), they will demonise progressive ideals - "t he woke elitists have come to take your BBQ and your ute ", and they will continue to attack “big business” (Gina Rinehart's operations excepted of course given Duddy is Big Vag's bestest boy..." fetch Pete....good boy...who's a good boy? "). "Publicly-owned corporations have embraced diversity, equity and inclusion policies. They declare commitments to “sustainability”. And plenty of them have backed causes like marriage equality, Black Lives Matter and the Indigenous Voice to Parliament." David Smith, The Conversation on what's behind the Tories' newly discovered antipathy to big business. Strongman leaders cement their hold on power through a cult of personality. The Lib's inculcators have decided to exploit Duddy's natural thug instincts by packaging them as strongman virtues for the rubes and uninformed. What is concerning is that a country that fools itself that it's made up of stoic, BS-proof larrikins yet vetoed the Voice and clings to a foreign monarchy for comfort can be suckered by Duddy's Trumpist alarmism. But we're not Americans. We won't be conned by a gormless goon, autocrat and shameless opportunist. Will we? Is this the bald fella lately? Would he go full MAGA? Peter Dutton’s road to nowhere. The opposition leader has an electorally ineffective obsession. Peter Brent, Inside Story, 28 August 2024 Peter Dutton is racist. Here's the proof. Crikey.($) Dutton ignored warnings as offshore processing show ‘rolls on’, says Labor . A damning internal Home Affairs audit shows Paladin, the contractor paid $532 million to run the Manus Island detention centre, was never properly assessed... SMH. February 12, 2024. Dutton says ‘strong’ leader needed to heal anxious, divided nation. SMH. January 11, 2025. ($) “Weak leaders create hard times – but strong leaders create better times,” Dutton will say, according to an excerpt of the speech seen by this masthead.

I yam what i yam All his own work Peter Spud Dutton, the joyless eeew tuber and social media phobe, has taken to TikTok. Somehow someone in the Tory machine decided that wider exposure of a bloke who picked up his inter-personal skills at an abbatoir was a good idea. This is curious given Spud could suck the stimulation from a sensory deprivation chamber; a malevolent brute who should be preceded in his every appearance by a trigger warning and an MA rating. "One of the key factors behind successful political engagement on TikTok is authenticity. The platform thrives on genuine, relatable content." Susan Grantham, Lecturer in Communication, Griffith University. The Conversation TikTok is a channel often used to humanise politicians. So how is Nasty Brutale, a race-baiting tubermensch, going to humanise his inherent hatefulness yet still be authentic? Does he think his odiousness can be a selling point, that it's palatable to the TikTok generation of Zoomers with their short attention spans, screen-driven FOMO and escapist psyches? Well, nup. The things Pete likes are not going to endear a horror like him to the sooky la-la generation - the dark-uniformed goon squads, the clang of cell doors closing on small, brown fingers, Klan hoods and nipple clamps, puppy-poking sticks, his Klauss Barbi doll, the windchimes on Big Gina's vajazzle and being OK with the mass slaughter of Palestinian toddlers. Not an easy sell and subtlety is not a defining Spud characteristic - he's proud of his punisher reputation. So he's doing what comes naturally - scaring the shit out of the TikTokers but with focus rather than his generic "inner-city, woke elitist" shtick and arbitrary racism. Housing it is. “...I really joined TikTok for one reason. It’s to tell you that we do not have to live in a country where you spend your whole life renting,” Spud. Sept 2024. Spud revels in his serendipitous hard man persona but his is a saggy-arsed, puddin' physique however it is topped by a head that would frighten a robber's dog. It's that and his shameless appeal to the worst instincts that lets him carry it off. Like all bullies though, he's a coward with a glass jaw. When the going gets a bit tough he disappears ala Scooter Morrison. He disparages questioners, attacks the weak and vulnerable. He is, to put it in the technical terms of the cognoscenti, a complete prick. The celebration of avarice, mendacity and ignorance that is the federal Oppostion talent pool is going through a dry spell so there's no threat to Spud from this bin jizzle. The Squeak to his Bubba, his 2IC, the ever-flustered, overwrought Sussan Clitorissa Ley (she's a bundle of nerves) is endlessly bewildered that she, a female, is in such a prominent position in the Tory sausage club hence she routinely drops handgrenades intended for the government onto the foot she just shot herself in. If the mien of a spaniel being shown a card trick was at all marketable then Suss may have gained some cachet, not least with the window lickers and the autofellatists. Michaelia Cash, the phlegm fatale of auspol who, her screech impediment aside, has a soft side; an obvious moistening round the flange in the presence of rugged TV reno guy Scott Cam . Bell-bottomed, helmet haired, V05 abusing marching bands may relate but it's a niche appeal. Often touted as PM material by the born-to-rule set, person of interest and flight risk Angus Squizzy Taylor, the man of steal, has a proven track record in monetising government for familial benefit and so has cemented his credentials as a Tory blue blood. The Luck Of The Taylors .Ronni Salt, Jommy Tee. Dingo News. 21 June 2019 Unfortunatley for Angus he's not just dodgy, he's a fucking idiot. “ Angus is a leader, I guess, of the NSW right ,” one Liberal says. “ It’s a faction of one. ”¹ Shadow Minister for Cyber Security little Jimmy Paterson, equipped with schoolboy beard, laminated Powerpoint IPA graduate certificate under his arm and Hitler Youth rosette on his lapel, is a recent virulent critic of TikTok. Jimmy has suddenly lost his enthusiasm for banning it, proving at least that he's got that indispensible Tory credential - blatant hypocrisy. But til his testicles descend I doubt the old boys would consider him as a leadership contender. The rest of them (Bridget Archer excepted, perhaps also Julian Leeser) are so pointless, so soporifically mediocre, so forgettable that they do not even warrant a half-hearted ragging. The ethical, talented independents collectively holding the balance of power in a minority government means we no longer need a viable Opposition for a functioning democracy but it's still rather pathetic that spiralling down from the horrendous Howard to Abbott to Morrison the Tories now have little choice other than to buff their bald, beige jobbie and tell us that he smells like roses. ¹ ‘The vengeance approach’. Karen Middleton, The Saturday Paper. A far from comprehesive list of the political career highlights of the tinpotato Joined TikTok in an attempt to be "demure" & "fun" after he was attacking the PM as being weak for not banning it Australia wide. Touts nuclear as a sop to the climate denial idealogues - knowing it will never materialise. Peter Dutton wants you to hate foreign students Dutton’s MAGA Down Under pamphlet shows how vulnerable he is on migration Refugee/boats BS Opposition to key policies that would benefit Australians Demanding a ban on Palestinians fleeing a genocide, referring to Muslim political candidates as a “disaster” Dutton is copying Trump’s tactics on migration by blocking Labor’s efforts to reduce migration On abortion: "“I don’t think it’s a debate that is shifting votes one way or the other”.Oct 24. “We will not be changing our position; it cost us votes in Queensland, in metropolitan seats in particular, the reaction from women was visceral,” Nov 24 Gina Rinehart and Peter Dutton's 2024 (that we know of): Peter flies to her party in the Pilbara on private jet 12 hours flying for less than an hour at her party in Perth Big Vag's Brisbane mansion for Liberal fundraiser Big Vag buys a table for Peter's fundraiser Coalition feels heat as housing experts slam ‘unsafe’ plan to pause building standards Family trust received $5.6M in taxpayer funding Dutton likely unscathed by damning Home Affairs revelations, thanks to the media Claimed election rigging for the Voice with no crosses allowed on ballot paper. Peter Dutton and the Coalition have refused to support a parliamentary motion commemorating October 7 because it also recognised the civilian loss in Palestine and Lebanon. A free speech U-turn is under way, with Peter Dutton leading the charge Peter Dutton wants to have it both ways on hate-speech laws - https://www.smh.com.au/politics/federal/a-free-speech-u-turn-is-underway-with-peter-dutton-leading-the-charge-20241002-p5kfbn.html “I think every Australian should be aware of the Teal Political Party. It’s owned by a billionaire - Simon Holmes à Court” Dutton lied at a presser in Brisbane, Peter Dutton’s campaign to kill Labor’s multinational tax reforms. “I don’t discriminate against anybody, on any basis” - Peter Dutton, 1 October, 2024 Dutton on ABC,“We don’t do hate in Australia” The lingering influence of Tony Abbott and Peta Credlin on Peter Dutton Why Labor call him 'double standards Dutton': Inside Liberal leader's secret trip to India - while the PM was under fire for being over 'Airbus Albo' Peter Dutton has said he made an apology for comments about Lebanese Muslims and immigration “mistakes” to a single “senior person”, who he has declined to name. Dutton walked out when the report of veterans' suicides was being delivered in Parliament Laura Tingle "It's perplexing how Peter Dutton continues to get kudos for being the go-to politician on the national security beat, when he has so clearly not just ignored the advice of ASIO but undermined the agency's credibility." Said a question on sexuality was part of “the woke agenda”. The existing census had “stood us well as a country”, The bloke left Home Affairs and Immigration in total chaos Warning of blackouts, Peter Dutton and the Liberal Party go to war with facts and science. Peter Dutton claims Holocaust survivors living in Australia since 1945 are talking about going back to Israel because of anti-Semitism. However, Israel was not established until 14 May, 1948 On his return from a VIP trip to Israel declares that the Australian Government should never have commissioned the Binskin Report into the IDF slaughter of identified Aid workers including Australian Zomi Frankcom. Peter Dutton said "there will be no Makarrata or truth-telling mechanism under a gov I lead".Indicating that a future lib government would dismantle any voice, truth telling, Makarrata mechanisms. "Dutton – never a big fan of lawyers, or abstractions like the rule of law ..." George Brandis, Australia's richest person Gina Rinehart held two private fundraisers for Peter Dutton at her Queensland homes. It was a staggering $14,000 per head, with invitees warned it would go to Dutton no strings attached. Peter Dutton predicts that if the government is returned it will be in minority and "will include the Greens, it'll include green teals, it'll include Muslim candidates from western Sydney, it will be a disaster." Charging us $23K for a jet to Tamworth to speak at a Newscorp event, sponsored by Gina Rinehart to talk about the cost of living crisis. Dutton’s abysmal record on immigration integrity Dutton’s department released two men convicted of accessory to murder. Also released 102 convicted sex offenders. Peter Dutton on Ch 9, re university Gaza protests: "This is the 1930s all over again." “I believe our very civilization as we know it, our civilizational values are under threat. And this is not a time for weak leadership. It's not a time for weasel words. This is not a time to try and walk both sides of the street.” Comparing a protest March with the murders at Port Arthur. Dutton failed 4 out of 6 units in his 1st year studying Business at uni & was kicked out. He was later readmitted but took 10 years to complete his degree, failing most units & having to redo them multiple times. Told a private meeting with big business CEOs 20/3/24 that he wants to help them repeal Labor's laws that have raised wages and made jobs more secure. CSIRO chief warns against ‘disparaging science’ after Peter Dutton criticises nuclear energy costings March 2024 Opposition Leader Peter Dutton (who has a business degree but no science credentials) claimed a report from CSIRO was “discredited”, claiming: “It’s not relied on. It’s not a genuine piece of work.” Peter Dutton spotted with colourful Liberal-aligned property developer. Dutton admitted in a major speech in Adelaide, attended by just 40 people, that his approach on the Voice was “grounded in pragmatism”. Niki Savva SMH 'Kitchen Cabinet' “I'm good at the sort of pulling down and wrecking part.. His called for Woolies boycott never happened Immigration Minister Dutton issued a visa for a convicted sex offender. $92 million on failed visa platform outsourcing. $55 million for 4 refugees sent to Cambodia, Dutton says it’s right that we lock up children as young as 10. That’s the age of criminal responsibility and it shouldn’t change, he said, because kids know they are committing serious offences. Peter Dutton and his Department paid Paladin a total of $532 million for a contract that lasted 801 days - that’s equivalent to $664,169 per day. We had a Royal Commission on whether Julia Gillard paid a bill 20 years before and on whether Bill Shorten lodged a document late. Peter Dutton and Paladin? - Barely reported. The only thing that appears to have changed with Operation Sovereign Borders is Peter Dutton is now constantly providing a narrative on it. He spent years telling us not to run commentary on it. Craig Foster “Peter Dutton made clear that in his view refugees were burning themselves alive in attempts to come to Australia” "Israel is responding with proportion." A report detailing the links between criminal activity and Australia’s offshore detention regime put Opposition Leader Peter Dutton’s time in charge of immigration under scrutiny. Tony Burke slammed Peter Dutton’s “glass jaw” after the Opposition leader claimed offence to comments from Clare O’Neil who accused Dutton of protecting paedofiles. It was Home Affairs under Pazzullo and Dutton that wanted to secretly use Australia’s high-tech overseas spy & surveillance organisation — ASD, Australian Signals Directorate — to monitor and spy on Australian citizens, in Australia. Peter Dutton as immigration minister exercised a discretion allowing the plaintiff, whose case overturned indefinite immigration detention, to reapply for a visa after he was convicted of raping a 10-year-old Under Dutton Australia took in two axe murders from Rwanda via a swap with refugees from Manus Island. Peter Dutton has claimed that Labor has overseen 105,000 asylum seekers entering Australia. This is false — most entered Australia under the Coalition. Dutton’s own incompetence as a senior minister is the stuff of record now, especially his loss of control of our borders and his undermining of national security through the maladministration of the Home Affairs portfolio, the most bungling, error-prone department in the Commonwealth. Dutton called for a royal commission into child sex abuse in remote communities. He wants an audit of spending on Indigenous programs, ignoring that 22 such audits were conducted while his party was in office, with no change to outcomes. ‘Dog act’: NT police minister reacts angrily to Peter Dutton’s claims of Alice Springs child sexual abuse. Dismissal of Kylea Tink’s complaint alleging aggressive behaviour towards her by one of his MPs. Used the Qantas dispute to disrupt parliament with a spurious challenge to a ruling by Speaker Milton Dick. Gaza politicalisation. Dutton bypassed Indigenous community safety for grants in Coalition seats Dutton calling for an audit on ATSI agencies when the coalition cut $15m from the Auditor General.... resulting in 30% fewer audits in their 9 years of government. The Nixon review reveals Peter Dutton presided over a department that enabled organised crime, sex traffickers and illegal immigrants to disregard our borders. Dutton on Abbott. "Despite his tenure being unfairly cut short it constitutes one of the finest contributions of Australian prime ministers in the modern era." "What made Tony a first-class leader was that he is a first-class thinker, one of the most intelligent people we could ever meet." "No-one wants a second referendum" said the main guy proposing one. While Peter Dutton went on Ray Hadley's program to condemn "the hatred that continues to come out of Marcia Langton's mouth" and warn of her influence should she be appointed to the Voice, one wonders if he held those views when the cabinet of which he was a member appointed her to design the Voice. 10 Feb 2021. Home Affairs Minister Peter Dutton's office fast-tracked a $880,000 one-off grant to retail association eight days after they made a $1,500 donation to the Q'lnd LNP at an event Mr Dutton attended for the purpose of personally supporting him. Scolded all the nasty millionaire CEOs last month for donating shareholder funds to the Voice while he looked the other way when they donated shareholder funds to the Liberal Party. Never ending demands for more detail on the Voice yet no curiosity on the awarding of $M in contracts to dodgy operators Canstruct, or giving $9m to a grifter with a record of unpaid debts & bribery, Peter Dutton briefed on bribery investigation before his government signed contract. Took a vague complaint against Bruce Pascoe, author of 'Dark Emu', suggesting he committed fraud, to the Australian Federal Police. It was dismissed. Dutton markets himself as Prime Minister for Queensland. Slandering of two of our most senior public servants as “tainted”. Dutton is so appalling Lib MPs opted for Scooter Morrison as PM. “Peter Dutton, like his Coalition colleague Barnaby Joyce, says findings of ‘serious corruption’ should be made only by a judge and jury,” Peter Dutton " When the problems were brought to the attention of the government at the time, the program was stopped. I'm sorry to those people adversely affected, I truly am." The opposition leader claims robodebt was stopped when its legality was called into question, even though the report found its “unfairness, probable illegality and cruelty became apparent” in early 2017 and “the path taken was to double down, to go on the attack in the media against those who complained and to maintain the falsehood that in fact the system had not changed at all”. Despite ICAC finding Gladys Berejiklian had engaged in corrupt conduct, Peter Dutton says she's 'not a corrupt person'."Her integrity's not in question." Declared that the Chinese Communist Party was backing Albanese and Labor in the election. The statement was so toxic that it provoked an unprecedented public warning from ASIO's chief, Mike Burgess. As health minister, Peter Dutton cut $50 billion from hospitals, tried to introduce a $7 GP tax and secretly launched the Medicare Privatisation Task force. Dutton is saying Labor has to treat Australians with respect. This from the party of #Robodebt Peter Dutton on 2GB, on the $5 note: "I think it's another attack on our systems, on our society and our institutions... I know the silent majority don't agree with a lot of the woke nonsense that goes on". Dutton chose to attend Pell funeral over being in attendance at meeting about The Voice Dutton says that Labor removing the cashless debit card has led to the crime in the NT. In FACT, the card was STILL IN USE until March in the NT. if you work hard and put your head down you could rise from $90.000 per annum to $200.000 per annum to get a $9,000 tax cut. Claiming that Andrew Thorburn modelled ethical behaviour at NAB is a fascinating turn, given that whole “charging fees for no service even to dead people” admission at the Royal Commission. Brother Stuie Robert: "Don't judge Peter Dutton on his comments or actions." Peter Dutton suggesting that an anti same-sex marriage song be performed in response to Macklemore's 'Same Love' at the 2017 NRL Grand Final “Renewables are irrelevant at night time.” 19/6/22 Dutton's maiden speech: "I have seen the sickening behaviour displayed by people who, frankly, barely justify their existence in our sometimes over tolerant society." Peter Dutton awarded Canstruct International a $1.8 billion contract despite having: No staff No assets No revenue They did, however, have a rich history of political donations to the Liberal Party Tharunicaa Murugappan was denied a cake for her 2nd birthday. Characterised Brittany Higgins' rape “as an extra curricular activity”. A veteran asks Peter Dutton to urgently assist Afghan interpreters fearing for their lives and the only reply he gets is two police officers at his door concerned he is a security threat, The sociologist who helped expose alleged war crimes by Australian special forces soldiers in Afghanistan was cut off from receiving future contracts to research military culture The whistleblower whose landmark report sparked a major investigation into alleged war crimes by Australian soldiers warned Defence Minister Peter Dutton she wouldn’t be “silenced, bullied or intimidated” over new book, Blood Lust, Trust and Blame Declared war on morning teas Fast-tracked a one-off $880,000 grant proposal to a retail association eight days after it made a $1,500 political donation to the Queensland Liberal National Party — at an event Mr Dutton attended — for the purpose of personally supporting him. Confiscated asylum seeker phones Brought Covid into Qld Dutton's wife Kirilly was appointed as a Director at Mental Health Foundation of Aus. She has no quals in mental health Department of Home Affairs under Dutton justified spending more than $450,000 on wining and dining, while splashing a further $100,000 on office upgrades Labor candidate for Dickson Ali France lost her leg protecting her kids in a car park accident, and he’s used this against her,

As the L/NP turns orange what will Albo do? "He's a big thinker and a deal maker" The Angry Potato, chief Ginacologist¹ in the L/NP coaliphate, is openly t̶u̶g̶g̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶ f̶o̶r̶e̶l̶o̶c̶k̶ bending his knee in the direction of the orange-stuccoed Dementadon. Where does this leave Albo? ¹ If I have to explain this then you're probably in the wrong place. The US is a global village. Now hosting its biggest idiot. You'll likely hear the sound of breaking waves if you ever put your ear up to his. Occasionally a cockroach may skitter across behind those piggy eyes, searching for the ketamine that keeps it alive in that otherwise barren space. Words sometimes enter too...only to tumble back out as bizarre twaddle - "the late, great Hannibal Lecter", a riff on the incompatibility of water and magnets, proposing the annexation of Canada and Greenland, extolling the virtues of a cabinet of Star Wars bar scene rejects and so much more, all of it expressed in the vocabulary of a remedial reading class for semi-sentient plant life. Nevertheless Spud tells us Donny didn't become president for the second time "by being anything other than shrewd" and that he "brings gravitas". "I think a lot of people ... are coming to grips with it as well as he's a big thinker and a deal maker," Spud on Sydney radio 2GB on Trump's Sur-La-Med spa and golf resort plan for Gaza The Tories' boner for Trump and all things MAGA is now apparent following the success of his biggest grift yet - the 2024 election. The party that claims monopoly ownership of family values, fiscal responsibility, integrity, respect for institutions and law and order would, of course, admire a rapist, convicted felon, insurrectionist, multiple bankrupt, fraud, blatant grifter, habitual liar, moronic bloviating braggart, ignoramus and perjurer, a daughter fondler, a porn star defiling vulgarian and a despot-fawning lickspittle. Whiskey Tango Alpha Fuck? "Malignant tuber P. Duddy is far more inclined to pluck Gina Rinehart's chin hairs than he is to openly lick the Orange Dementodon's earlobe à la Trump's fellow hosen scheisse Scooter Morrison... Trump's flagrant egregiousness affords Duddy cover for his own abuses which look defensible in comparison. The Tories watch Trump to learn how to tie a bow on a turd. And the tawdriness of their junk drawer politics, their recreational corruption, can be waved away" Words I posted just last month have been overtaken by events. Spud is now openly fondling the tangerine ballbag. Trump's egregiousness, by virtue of the status of the office he holds, gives licence to the dregs of this world to be the awful people they've always been: MAGAe, Rudy Giuliani, Elon Musk, RFK Jnr, Tulsi Gabbard, Nigel Farage, Benjamin Netanyahu , the AfD et al...and the L/NP. What began as copy-catting by the Veggie Patch has morphed into open, servile admiration. Temu Trumpism. Spud's shadow minister for government efficiency (DOGE/SMOGE). Her new job is to cut “wasteful spending”. Make America Great Again/Get Australia Back On Track populist easy fixes to complicated issues, anti-renewables, slashing the public service, a war on woke, the "radical left", the anti-immigration hard man and the casual racism now includes the cheering on of ethnic cleansing and genocide. The whole Tory ecosystem is on board. Carb agnostic Mistress Gina has urged her bald, lumpen factotum to "be like Trump”. Ex-Foreign Minister (the exier the better) the foppish, plummy-vowelled, sago pudding in a suit that is Alexander Curly Downunder told Sky News that Trump's proposed ethnic cleansing of Gaza is a “ wonderful case of a leader disrupting the status quo ”, “ Palestinians are so radicalised, I mean, these are Islamists... ". Dutton will be Trump-lite but he's cautious, telling the RWFWs like Alex Antic and the aptronymic Littleproud to leave the anti-Trans, anti-abortion issues off the table until after the election. There's a definite limit to how much Trumpism Aussies will tolerate. And herein lay an opportunity for Albo. Spineless Castrato  said he would not offer a running commentary on Trump's remarks, declining to state a view. That's a tad unfair. As PM, Albo must be careful in how he phrases push back on a US president whoever that president may be. And he has been circumspect. What he has missed though is a golden opportunity to wedge Spud by goading him into a more whole-hearted embrace of Trump and his odious, deranged scheme for Gaza Realty and Ethnic Cleansing.com and thereby exposing him as the toadying, clueless wannabe despot he really is. They love 'em some fascist discipline do the Tories "The Germans may be pulling down the Churches, but they have erected the State, with Hitler at its head, into the sort of religion which produces a spiritual exaltation that one cannot but admire and some small portion of which would do no harm among our own somewhat irresponsible population." Pig Iron Bob Menzies in letter to his sister, 1938 Trump’s re-election has enabled Dutton the chance to play his role of a lifetime . Niki Savva, SMH ($) "Peter Dutton has been lucky, until now, to be campaigning at a time when feelings mattered so much more than facts. Lucky that securing sympathetic coverage and plenty of it came cheap if you amplified people’s grievances and anxieties." Trump wants to turn Gaza into the Gold Coast. His motive is blindingly transparent. Michael Koziol, SMH ($) "The idea the United States would take control of the Gaza Strip, level it and turn it into something approximating the Gold Coast beggars belief, and can barely be taken seriously – except, of course, that it comes from the most powerful person in the world."

Imgflip No grace, no dignity, no humility, no magnanimity, no class, no morals, no empathy, no soul. He has no friends, not even a dog. His wife can't bear his touch, his daughter can't avoid it. Devoid of humour he doesn't make jokes, he doesn't laugh. Not ever. An occasional dismal rictus, a necrotic gash in his ochre-laquered face bladder signifies nothing more than his satisfaction in transacting another con . He's a loathsome coagulation of every human failing with no compensating virtues. A craven coward. A sociopath. A serial rapist. A racist. A quisling. An opportunistic grifter. An inveterate cheat. A deceitful toad. A chronic liar. A shameless braggart. An ignoramus who lacks curiosity. He doesn't read, he doesn't care. Trump is a ridiculous, combed-over cartoon villain, a deranged clown with a face sprayed the colour of hang-over piss and toilet paper stuck to his shoe whose wits are defeated by an open umbrella. Rake the forests, nuke the hurricanes, inject the bleach, waterbomb Notre Dame cathedral, trade Greenland for Puerto Rico. Trump's pompous idiocies are exceeded only by his appalling ignorance. Crediting the British with the foresight to build airstrips in the war of independence 110 years before the Wright Brothers first took flight, revealing the hitherto unknown Himalayan countries of Nipple and Button, accusing Baltic leaders of starting Balkans wars! This clueless buffoon brags that he was able to keep the crayon inside the lines on his dementia test. Accusing Trump of a lack of self-awareness is like accusing Myra Hindley of poor child care standards. The Grand Fubar of dysfunction, the maestro of petty vindictiveness, of malice and resentful beligerence is testing coup options yet America flatters itself as being "the world's greatest democracy" much to the bemusement of observers here in Oz. It's beyond our imagining that we'd ever have a bloated braggart, a liar, a hypocrite, a lazy shirker, a crony-stacking blame shifter at the helm filtering Murdoch's kidney stones through his teeth while monetising a pandemic for the benefit of rich mates. Oh...what? Trump, if he'd had the imagination, would've considered handing out small-pox infected blankets in Democrat-leaning districts but it's too late now. A majority of Americans have said enough is enough. After 4 years of what-the-fuck-has-he-done-now, 46,123 tweets and 20,000 documented lies while in office to 9th July 2020 he's been reduced to pathetic whimperings from his puckered-sphincter pout, playing his invisible accordian to an audience of gormless dullards, fellow hucksters and his retinue of fawning toadies, thralls, invertibrate lickspittles and hangers-on whose fealty is demanded but never reciprocated and who had neither the self-respect nor the courage to call out the capture of the US by an amoral, moronic lunatic. We cannot know what tipped the scales against Trump. No lie has been too outrageous, bragging about sexual assault was just locker-room talk, five bankruptcies are apparently indicative of an astute businessman, stealing from a children's cancer charity is fake news. Being laughed at by foreign leaders - meh, because y'all - "Merica!" Throwing meat to Boogaloos, Proud Boys, Klansmen and Call Of Duty cos-players was addressing his base. Perhaps it was his inciting of violence from uniformed goon squads sooled onto lawful BLM protesters that crossed the line. Perhaps it was the denigration of war dead and veterans as losers and suckers by a draft-dodging, yellow, mangy dog that did it. More likely it was 11 million Covid infected Americans, a quarter of a million who died while the orange blobulator ignored it, denied it, played it down, finger-pointed and then looked for ways to exploit it for his own advantage. There is no excusing Trump, there is no sympathy that should be wasted on this pathetic parasite. History should not record him as some sort of tragic King Lear but as an effluvium, a discharge from the bowels of a diseased system; a funk that has now been sharted. He had always exhibited the narcissistic and antisocial personality disorders of a lack of empathy, grandiosity, lying and deceit, indifference to conventional laws or rules or morality that characterise a despot. But he possessed none of the cunning, artiface, commitment to a cause beyond himself, the political skills of a Stalin or the oratory of a Mussolini. He had no ambition beyond the grift and the trappings - palaces awash with potentate kitsch, a yearning for military parades, a pneumatic wife and his narcissistic cult of personality. He has no talent beyond the con, he's a schmuck with the dumb luck to be born into wealth that mestasised B-grade celebrity into A-grade larceny. Fittingly he's spending his last days shaping his own humilitation. It's an Armando Iannucci script playing out in real life. If Trump was to be found drooling in a pool of his own piss ala Stalin or dragged Sadam-like from his bolt-hole it would be the most metaphorically noteworthy achievement of his time in office. Gone too will be his dreadful spawn. Ivanka's in-it-up-to-her-nose-job reputation may limit her future career prospects to handjob supervisor at a New York sperm bank while Uday and Qusay* could end up in Ryker's Island trading sexual favours for a line of coke. Jared Kushner may get a gig at a Madame Tussaud exhibit of automatronic rent boys. Melania, no doubt, would enjoy the embrace of a Justin Trudeau look-alike cabana boy, chuckling at the thought that Trump has only Rudi Guiliani left to look for loopholes in the pre-nup. The end of America's nightmare is near. However it plays out over the next two months Trump is finished. The irrelevant man. A loser. * Nod to Marina Hyde in the UK Guardian Huw Parkinson - Youtube Also publshed by the Australian Independent Media Network . Trump the friendless president - thewhig.com Lest we forget the horrors: A catalog of Trump's worst cruelties, collusions, corruptions and crimes - McSweeney's.com “ Donald Trump has failed us because he is, as he has always been, incompetent, and he suffers from extremely severe mental disorders, which render him incapable of attending to any issue beyond his own personal need for adulation...The mental condition he suffers most from is formally known as a severe instance of narcissistic personality disorder .” Dr John Zinner, the former head of the Unit on Family Therapy Studies at the National Institute of Mental Health "Born amid made-up crowd size claims and “alternative facts,” the Trump presidency has been a factory of falsehood from the start, churning out distortions, conspiracy theories and brazen lies at an assembly-line pace that has challenged fact-checkers and defied historical analogy ." The New York Times .

The recrudescence of Donald J Trump Image: source unknown I t was a perfect verdict, a beautiful verdict. Probably the most beautiful verdict the world has ever seen. A jury has awarded Trump rape victim E. Jean Carroll $US83.3 million in damages all while Perp#1 sweats on the outcome of an in-progress New York civil fraud trial that is seeking the return of $US370 million from dodgy deals he made by cooking the books. The karma bus has big, orange bug spatter all over its windscreen; the eviscerated Gropenfuhrer adding a new word to his vocabulary - consequences. He's been rejected, reviled, lampooned, impeached, probed and indicted. He stole highly classified documents to trade for profit or leverage. He incited sedition. He exploited the office of POTUS to further enrich himself and his spawn. He faces 91 criminal indictments. Eleven of his associates have been charged with crimes. He endorsed cookers and election deniers as mid-term candidates and he threatens and denigrates anyone who dares challenge him. Mafia Don is unconstrained by any notion of decency or compliance with civil norms. There's evil and there's vile. Bleach Boy spans both, yet the MAGA cult remains impervious. The cos-play ammosexuals, the beer belly putsch of Gravy Seals, Green Buffets and other camoed, AR15ed people-of-girth, the douche coup seditionists and the IQ defaulting, credulous simpletons and the morally-agnostic detritus continue to genuflect in his general direction. A proven sexual predator. (Trump once told a lawyer he didn't find her attractive enough to sexually assault.) "He's our boy." Putin's bitch. "A true patriot." A demonstrably compulsive liar. "Alternative facts." A grifter, serial bankrupt, fraudster and thief. "Gonna send him my last $20." An overt racist. "Now we're talkin'." A covetous vulgarian. "Classy guy." A petulant, whiney bitch and grievance-mongering, bloated, shit-fit throwing toddler. "An American hero." A wanna-be despot, a bully and a bone-spurred coward. "I like how he stands up for the little guy." Donald Trump has been arrested more times than he’s been elected. A malice-driven, junk food epicure. A fatuous, bloviating braggart. A daughter-fondling sleaze, a homicidal exhorter to violence. A pretender - an inheritance squandering, multiple bankrupt. A veteran-denigrating yellow, scabrous dog. An habitual loser with a mange-ravaged merkin glued atop an umber stuccoed pout that brings to mind a dog-groomer's floor sweepings humping a jack-o'-lantern. He is physically repugnant (some have put forward the proposition that he literally smells of loaded Depends ) , morally bankrupt, mentally damaged and cognitivley challenged. An odious chum bucket of every human failing, bar, so far, the machine-gunning of orphans' creches - but hey, if there's a buck in it... He's a paean to smug ignorance and gracelessness - Geographer. Specialising in SE Asia - "Thighland", "Nipple", "Button". The Balkans and the Baltic are the same to Donny Dorito. (Author's note: his latest wife is Slovenian.) Historian. Revolutionary War airstrips, WWII ending in 1917. Physicist. “All I know about magnets is this, give me a glass of water, let me drop it on the magnets, that’s the end of the magnets.” Meteorologist. "Nuke the hurricanes." Epidemiologist. Drink that bleach, stick that lava lamp up your ass. Diplomat. Publicly fellating Putin, Kim Jong Un, MBS, Xi - actual murderous despots. And so on. And on. Ad nauseam. A self-proclaimed billionaire bilking donations from hardscrabble rubes and swampies - Trump provokes their grievances, victimhood and anger as his business model. John Steinbeck once said that socialism never took root in America because the poor see themselves not as an exploited proletariat but as temporarily embarrassed millionaires. Trump cultivates that notion, blaming "radical leftists", Democrats, the woke, antifa, BLM and immigrants as the cause of the MAGA's disaffection from the American Dream© that is their due. Monetising a white, American Jesus is a doddle for a crude, faithless phony who could not believe his luck when credulous hordes of evangelising creationists jumped into his canoe. He didn't even need to bait his hook. Low-information chuckle-fuck MAGAs with attention spans that would embarrass a goldfish cheer an angry old man's vindictiveness, they revel in his outrages and his fuck you politics all while voting against their own best interests in favour of a man who would steal their last dime without a second thought. Trump may be the GOP's nominated presidential candidate for 2024 yet despite the angst of the psephologists and opinionista, the cheerleading of the Fox sewage farm and Putin's inevitable interference the tangerine tyrantosaurus will never again inhabit the White House. Either he will go to jail, the hamburger grease that functions as plasma in his veins will kill him or the meth party being held by the family of raccoons that live in his head will assume full control. Trump thinks a second term will save him, a prophylactic against pending criminal charges, but sadly for him he's a serial loser - "In 2018, Republicans lost the House. In 2020, they lost the Senate and the White House too. And last week, many of Trump’s handpicked candidates lost the midterm elections and delivered a great deal of humiliation to their party, which, instead of a predicted “red wave”, had to settle for a ripple. The party failed to retake the Senate, and might even end up with fewer numbers than in the outgoing chamber..." Al Jazeera House arrest with an ankle-bracelet, a Norma Desmond-like existence at his tacky Palm Beach motel, Tawdry-Sur-La-Mer, is perhaps the best he can hope for provided it's not sold off to recover some of his defamation and fraud outstandings and to pay his discount shopping mall lawyers. Maybe his future is to gibber incoherently to guests as he shuffles between tables or to whine self-pityingly about how unfair it all is, shadowed by his security goons with defibrillator and poop bags at the ready. The botoxed patsies and shit-grinning marks with their MAGA tat will pose for Instagram selfies so that their future progeny may wonder at what gormless morons their forebears were to be suckered by a sleazy, criminal dirtbag with creeping dementia. As the walls close in he will get increasingly desperate, calls for violence and retribution will be more open and he will frame the inevitable election result as stolen. He's a loser - a loser's loser. The question remains - will a palatable, mutant strain of Trumpist authoritarianism rise to take his place? * Junk food epicure. The family of raccoons that live inside his head : Hat tip to @itsJeffTiedrich. 11 Trump associates have now been charged with crimes . CNN. The long list of legal cases against Donald Trump . The Guardian What Ads Work With MAGA Voters  Rick Wilson " The now-unsealed indictment in the case of United States of America v. Donald J. Trump and Waltine Nauta has it all, seemingly every Trump flaw condensed into 49 pages and 38 counts of squalid detail. It is a devastating legal document, but it is also a damning character study of a man whose faults are all too familiar yet retain the power to shock and appall ." The WashingtonPost. Donald Trump is facing five years in prison and a felony because of a law HE SIGNED in attempt to punish Hillary Clinton in 2018. The law HE SIGNED upgrades the crime of wrongly moving classified material from a misdemeanor to a felony. Trump signed the bill after spending the 2016 presidential campaign accusing Hillary Clinton of improperly handling classified information. Salon.com " He is under a dozen investigations for crimes ranging from espionage to seditious conspiracy to defraud the U.S. and is going to prison. He committed treason, sedition, and incited a deadly insurrection. He lost in 2016 by 3 million votes. Lost the GOP the House in 2018, lost them the Presidency (by 9 million votes) and the senate in 2020 and lost them the senate (again) and prevented their red wave in 2022. He’s a 76 year old malignantly narcissistic morbidly obese drug addicted dementia-ridden abomination who doesn’t believe in exercise. Accomplishments of his administration, nepotism Barbie. Just crimes, disgraces, embarrassments, impeachable offenses, abuses of power, abrogations of oath, and violations of the U.S. constitution ." Andrew Wortman

Trump, the personification of America's decline, is Norma Desmond redux Sunset Boulevard - an aging silent film queen refuses to accept that her stardom has ended. The Washington Post and charactour.com drew some parallels: A Norma Desmond-like character, Trump watches Sunset Boulevard, “ one of the greatest of all time ,” again and again and again according to former White House press secretary Stephanie Grisham. Grisham notes, “ I’m sure that Trump has no clue — like none — how similar to him she was .” " I'm a star...The greatest star of them all. " " I' m rich! I'm richer than all this new Hollywood trash!...I own three blocks downtown ..." Norma Desmond. Sunset Blvd A narcissist, “obsessed with her looks” and “convinced that everyone loved her and lived in a fantasy world of her own making . With delusions of grandeur, living in a big white elephant of a place,” a home filled with portraits from the glory days, and she spends every afternoon in the projection room, watching her old films. “Every character in Sunset Blvd is tragic.” Norma’s life is a lesson. “Movie stars did not have happy lives.” * * * * * Trump, Grand FUBAR and Loser-In-Chief, is an addled old man. In his first tilt at the presidency he had some control of his faculties. He was driven by the grift and privilege and celebrity. For this round he has displayed the self-awareness, bowel control and temperament of a toddler and a panicked desire to avoid bunking in with Bubba. Not so much alpha male as scared, insecure, whiney bitch. His verbal discharges are a drone of self-pity from an otherwise vainglorious blowhard, the sibilance of a deflating cognition lisping from a puckered sphincter of a pout. His gibbering idiocies are part-formed in what's left of the putrefying mind of a life-long liar and braggart. But then there's his soaring rhetoric - better found scribbled on a truck-stop cubicle door. There's discursive harangues on post-birth abortions, Hannibal Lecter, schools undertaking sex reassignments, Marxist, fascist radical left windmills killing whales and causing cancer. There's his slurry of slurs and hate and grievance that rots his brain and may kill him before the corpulent Junk food epicure* has one double cheese-burger too many and prolapses his intestines into a gold-coloured toilet. Untroubled by the burdens of either wit or intelligence he unironically refers to himself in the 3rd person, and in fanciful anecdotes as "Sir" wherein scholars, the finest legal minds and big strong men with rippling muscles and tears in their eyes all defer to his genius, overwhelmed by his mastery of whatever issue is to hand. This self-fellating narcissist surrounds himself with ostentatious kitsch, a vacuous vulgarian whose gaudy Mar-a-Lago horrendium sur la mer is a revival of the "excessive, dated, dark, baronial LA manor" of Norma Desmond, reeking of mould and desperation and the " alcoholic ferment of generations of cougars in Chanel No.5 " (ouch New York Intelligencer). Trump is spiralling into dementia but deserves no sympathy. Recall his character, some of which I remind you of below. His only gift is the grift. An inveterate cheat he believes that playing by the rules is for losers. This Putin plaything is an insecure pantywaist with a dictator fetish. Desperate for validation he's readily manipulated with flattery and would sell out his country to murderous despots in exchange for a military parade and a statue in his honour. The sluggardly, wibbley-wobbley, gelatinous biomass of moobs and complaint was laughed at by world leaders and the UN General Assembly for his buffoonish, self-congratulatory onanism. He has no humour but a fragile ego and he hates to be mocked. Lacking all introspection he's a graceless bore who is indifferent to issues beyond his immediate self-interest. He's an appallingly ignorant simpleton yet he cannot stand being challenged. Grandpa Donny the family man, who you just know doesn't recognize the names of his grandchildren, would fundraise at a funeral of his own spawn. Imagine a silent auction of tawdry NFTs and gold-painted sneakers...displayed about Junior's corpse posed life-like in his coffin with the residue of Bolivia's finest still dusting his nostrils. The marquee merch is an autographed Trump bible ™ clasped in his cold, dead hands as pneumatic Strumpettes gather bids from the mourners. Classy. " Norma Desmond...epitomises super-rich self-delusion. Cocooned in privilege, she fancies herself a meritocratic success story. The fantasy of her self-made triumph is abetted by an information silo that she doesn’t even know she’s trapped in. Her sycophantic enabler...showers her with forged fan letters, as though anticipating the echo chamber that would manifest under the banner of Fox News. " Sunset Boulevard at 70, The Guardian. Photoworks Unlike Norma Desmond, tangerine man retains a significant retinue. Trumpworld is populated with thralls, supplicants, Nazi apologists, Bull Connor replicants, insurrectionists, conspirators and hordes of cultists with $9.99 gas station sunnies, goatees, MAGA caps and insouciant Brian Moran grammar and spelling with which to drag the libtards. There's ammosexuals, gravy seals and meal team 6ers, there's rubes who use family photo albums as an alternative to Tinder and there's evangelicals with their highly selective Christianity. The loons in his orbit - Elmo the space Nazi, Nick Fuentes, Jordan Peterson, Charlie Kirk et al and MAGA scamfluencers ala Alex Jones are opportunistic but hugely influential freaks and weirdos. The shameless long-drop of Fox News rolls the turd in chocolate and covers him with sprinkles. If you don't believe that there truly are malevolent lizard people out there then you've not met Rupert Murdoch. Elsewise there's the non-entities and hangers-on, botoxed, silicon-titted, duck-faced, inflatable skanks who gravitate to flash hucksters and, not least, the aspiring fellators of the tumid choad - trumpoline Laura Looney, parking garage lawyer* Alina Habba and Judge Toady Aileen Cannon. He's even got simps on the SCOTUS. But he is quite insane. He's ready for his close up, Mr. DeMille. An authentic photo: Snopes.com *@itsJeffTiedrich To beat Trump, we need to know why Americans keep voting for him. Psychologists may have the answer. George Monbiot, The Guardian. " Trump exemplifies extrinsic values. From the tower bearing his name in gold letters to his gross overstatements of his wealth; from his endless ranting about “winners” and “losers” to his reported habit of cheating at golf; from his extreme objectification of women, including his own daughter, to his obsession with the size of his hands; from his rejection of public service, human rights and environmental protection to his extreme dissatisfaction and fury, undiminished even when he was president of the United States, Trump, perhaps more than any other public figure in recent history, is a walking, talking monument to extrinsic values ."

The recrudescence of the orange putresence If only... They enthusiastically embraced a convicted felon and known rapist to be their country's exemplar. Not hesitatingly, not with caveats, not in ignorance of his crimes but knowingly and cheerfully. A tainted vulgarian represents their nation, its ethos, its character. He's their role model - a man who ran for president to stay out of prison. Trumpism was rampant across the popular vote and every single swing state. Not just a Republican Oval Office but a Republican Senate and a Republican House supplementing the Republican-stacked Supreme Court all pledging fealty to the outlandish cartoon creation of Roy Cohn and Mark Burnett without who Trump would've remained a carpet-bagging real-estate shonk ripping off creditors and assaulting women. And without Murdoch's Fox support he'd be wearing a colour-matched jumpsuit and a be-spooning Bubba would be cupping his balls in a hairy palm. His support was spread beyond the expected rapacious oligarchs, cryptobro chancers, Christofascists, Klansmen, proto-nazis, Qrackpots and the thinking-is-hard chucklefucks. The normalisation of the crazy was enabled by a craven GOP, a supine Merrick Garland In the DOJ and the corporate media, particularly but not solely the Fox navvies such as our very own Excretia Borgia - Mandy Devine on Murdoch's NY Post. Consequently, gormless, low information dullards will define the new America. 21 million Americans, out of the 81 million who voted for Biden in 2020 after seeing just how egregious Trump was as president the first time, swung back to support the orange burst trash bag of human failings after clear evidence he'd become even worse. Women, the sexual assault targets and foetus incubators without recourse to abortions under any circumstance, with their menstrual cycles to be recorded and tracked, were expected to be the saviours of American democracy by overwhelmingly rejecting the dystopian Handmaid's Tale of MAGA misogyny. Yet white women voted in the majority for Trump and young women went 8% more Trumpian than they did in 2020. 45% of Latino voters (Latino men 54%) thought that Trump's disparagements and threats against their demographic was intended for those other Latinos - you know, "those ones over there, the Mexicans, not us", anyway, look - Haitians are Black and it's nice to be able to look down on someone else. Pulling the ladder up behind them - the essence of arsehole fuckwittery but all good for the Americans' version of fuck-you capitalism, doncha know you commie fuck? Older white males were again the single biggest cohort within the Trumposphere. If you're in the group that holds the power then you stay within that group. Big surprise if it was any other way. The 'Others' who join in are a perverse group of camp followers hoping to share the spoils. As a paid-up member of the union of old, white men I shall posit the view that some potential waverers stuck with the orange aberration as a 'fuck you' to the self-righteous wowsers who assign every wrong throughout history to the "pale, stale and male". With 18-29 year olds, white women, Latinos and Black men all edging towards Trump while 65+ was the only age bracket with a movement to Harris and with Trump’s lead among white men shrinking (from 23 points in 2020 to 20 in 2024) it's perhaps time to retire that tired old trope. The only demographic emerging with dignity intact is Black women. " Harris won them by 85 points – a bigger lead than any other gendered and racial group measured by CNN " as reported in The Guardian. The other voters have retrospectively endorsed the 6th January coup attempt by default and were cool with his threats to do it again. They have given permission for Trump to live up to his promise of Putinesque defenestration of resistance and the shuttering of accountability. The country that trumpets itself (pun intended) as the resolute, heroic John Wayne of the world ("USA! USA! USA!") has celebrated a bloated, cowardly dog who disparaged those with character and with courage as suckers and losers; who used an Arlington Cemetery headstone as a prop for a look-at-me, grinning, thumbs-up photo-op and who whined at acknowledging veterans' sacrifices at a WW1 commemoration because rain would risk dampening that ridiculous yellow coiffe. They further embraced the cult by re-electing MAGA effluvia such as sporkfoot Marjorie Taylor-Green, the dumbest woman on the planet, and hand-shandy aficionado and skank-in-residence Lauren Can-I-Pull-Your-Dick Bobert. Dog abandoner Rafael Edward (Ted) Cruz who fled to Cancun when the state he represented froze over was put back into office by the very people he deserted in a crisis. The GOP platform was built on grievance, violence and hate. The Democrats countered with unicorns farting rainbows and singing Kumbyah. Much of the GOP is comprised of cowards and collaborators, the MAGA faithful are not disturbed by Trump's vileness as it provides succour for their own awfulness and it appals those they hate. It's why they adore him and it's why over the next 4 years playing nice aint gonna butter any parsnips. The Trump regime V2.0 will be an horrendium of freaks, kooks, criminals, morons, rent-seekers, Old Testament literalists and the miasma of resentment , retribution, white supremacy, unfettered avarice and violence. Dollar Store Goebbles Stephen Miller and his Wannsee Conference2 app will target migrants, legitimate or not, for mass detention and deportation. Sound familiar meine Freunde? Elmo the Space Nazi who single-handedly trashed Twitter after buying it for well-over it's value then wiping 80% off its worth will be reshaping the entire federal bureaucracy to shave off 1/3rd of its size. Good luck with your next welfare cheque, Cleetus. RFK Jnr, who in Kennedy family tradition has come to a gruesome end being Donny's choice as anti-vax health czar and Cooker In Chief. Polio, diphtheria, meningococcal, some new viral outbreak? Character building. Anyone participating in this regime will need to have significant MAGA credentials on their CV and be prepared to suck mushroom dick in public. Allegience to the Constitution will be entirely dispensible. Waiting in the wings, watching the hamburger grease accumulate in Trump's colon is alleged furnitur e fornicator and gofer for FRWNJ tech billionaire oligarch Peter Thiel who's most revealing quotes are: “ I no longer believe that freedom and democracy are compatible ” and “ The 1920s were the last decade in American history during which one could be genuinely optimistic about politics. Since 1920, the vast increase in welfare beneficiaries and the extension of the franchise to women – two constituencies that are notoriously tough for libertarians – have rendered the notion of ‘capitalist democracy’ into an oxymoron .” Vladimir Putin will of course be available at all times for consultation. * * * * * The face of the USA, the one it will present to the world, will be that of a bloviating simpleton, it's lips pursed like a puckered sphincter, its tiny hands concertinaing in time to meandering, narcissistic gibberish, a look of incomprehension behind the squinty, piggy eyes in those pallid tide marks within the congealed orange stucco. The self-titled Land Of The Free has opted for a moronic autocrat. What the fuck did you just do, America? We're not gonna make it, are we? Roy Cohn: The mysterious US lawyer who helped Donald Trump rise to power . BBC. " Cohn is best known now for the lessons he taught Trump, but even before that he was an outsized figure running through US politics and culture. To note his most flagrant hypocrisy, Cohn was a gay man who persecuted other gay people out of their government jobs during what became known as the Lavender Scare of the 1950s. " And irony of ironies given Trump's affinity with Putin and collusion with Russia: " ...as an assistant prosecutor in 1951, he helped engineer the conviction and execution of Julius and Ethel Rosenberg as Soviet spies ..." Mark Burnett Stands Firmly Behind The Reality TV President He Helped Create. Deadline.com. " This much is known: Burnett anointed a financially foundering, B-list self-promoter named Donald Trump to star in Apprentice, stuck with him through 14 seasons, defined his imperious style, edited away his disastrous miscues and tirelessly promoted his dubious brand. " Anatomy of three Trump elections: How Americans shifted in 2024 vs. 2020 and 2016 . CNN. Why is a group of billionaires working to re-elect Trump? Robert Reich. The Guardian. " Oligarchs like Elon Musk and Peter Thiel aren’t just hostile to progressivism. They’re hostile to American democracy itself. " Does Marjorie Taylor Greene Only Have 3 Toes on Each Foot? Snopes.

Back to the future with Matt King Coal Re-arranging the kerosene lamps, UBD street directories, Box Brownies and back issues of Playboy at Ye Olde Telex & VCR Rentals Pty Ltd t/a the National Party. Ladies lounge now open - please have your husband sign you in. The rightest right winger in the right wing of the right wing partner within the right wing coalition says he will appeal to a broad section of Australians. Of the nation’s 226 federal parliamentarians only 18 identify as National Party¹. They attracted 3.8 per cent of electors under their own banner. They're undergoing an existential crisis as the red neck vote follows Drunkerby Joyce to the Ginger Minger's goat rodeo. Aptronymic David 𝖣̶𝗈̶𝗅̶𝗂̶𝗍̶𝗍̶𝗅̶𝖾̶ Littleproud has quit the leadership, further annoying Drunkerby by creating an opening that the empurpled one can now no longer fill. In line with Tory tradition DoLittle's self-aggrandising "achievements" were Abbottesque contrarianisms - undoing the worthy initiatives of others. His proudest works were withdrawing Nationals' support for net zero and leading the fight against first Australians' interests via the blatantly deceitful campaign to deny them their Voice to Parliament. His spruiking of nuclear energy is Nationals' BAU - an unviable boondoggle paid for by others. It was intended to sabotage renewable energy markets with the added bonus of upsetting the rubes' bêtes noires - those "woke/elite/inner-city/latte sipping/ABC watching Greens and Teals". Twice splitting with the Liberal Party was a nice touch for DoLittle. Engineered to undermine Sussan Ley it has resulted in a by-election for her seat, one that could be a bloodbath for the Nationals. So rather than front any consequent finger-pointing the sook has done a runner. Most recognisable as the giggling idiot on the opposition front bench and for the rolled-up shirt sleeves affectation, DoLittle's absence from the job will be as noticeable as the hole left by a finger pulled from a bucket of water. Enter Matt Sooty Canavan. Preceded by 80cm of forehead. Matty's shtick is built around a narrower palette of contrived personalities than was FauxMo's daggy dad/father of the nation/brother Scotty/welder/pilot/man of the land/hair washer artifice. From Productivity Commission to KPMG to political staffer to senator, collars don't get any whiter than Matty's, bums don't get any shinier. So, his credibility-stretching pitch is that he's on the tools. At the literal coal face. Hi-Viz and blackface - face talc by Gautam of Ahmedabad, dayglo work shirts from Look@me costume hire. "In politics, you got to be yourself...He (Canavan) won’t try and change himself and put on false airs. He’ll just be himself." Former Nationals senator John "Wacka" Williams speaking to The Saturday Paper. LOL! Likely Sooty will drop the cos play now that he's the Big Knob, albeit in a very shallow gene pool. I do particularly like this one below though where anti-renewables Sooty has installed a wind & solar-powered device for Mrs Sooty as her Mother's Day present: Hi-Viz to install a clothes line? That's some nanny state overkill there, Sooty. Cos play aside, Sooty's personal brand is maverick, rabid, anti-renewable energy, anti-climate mitigation. “There is far too much emphasis on climate. It's just not that big a deal...". Yet: "It is completely hypocritical to make this amendment to the act, that restricts the use of nuclear energy... when we also need it to defend against the risk of climate change." Matt Canavan. 20 November, 2024 Sooty's job now, apart from presiding over the parliamentary Man-Coal Love Association, is to stop the bleeding of yokels, back blocks kulaks, ring-barkers and boondockers to One Nation whose trademark grievance mongering and racism has, like Nigel Farage's Reform cretin collective, tapped into the zeitgeist of Trumpist fearmongering. Will Sooty try and out-RWFW Hanson's swivel-eyed cookers? This brings Sooty into direct conflict with his old mate Drunkerby: “I think he’s going to raise the level of debate. I think he’s vastly, vastly more competent than Littleproud,” Joyce on Canavan's elevation. The Saturday Paper. 14 March, 2026 There's insufficient IQ in the rube base to share between the Twaddledumbs and Twaddledumbers of Nats vs One Notion so it will be entertaining to see how the Canavan/Joyce bromance is sustained as guns get drawn. Does he have what it takes to save the Nats? Sooty's perspicacity will be tested and found wanting - evidenced by his embrace of the born-to-rule delusions of the right: "Australians don't trust Labor on anything, not just energy." Matt Canavan. 20 November, 2024 MPs & senators - Labor: 123 , Nats: 18 As the enshittification of the world worsens Sooty at least will provide some entertainment. ¹National Party parliamentarians - HoR and Senate. Awkward:

Is it coincidence that each nominee here is a right wing politician? Me biased? Sure, aren't we all? Labor has had its share of shifty arseholes - Eddy Obeid, Joe Tripodi, Tony Kelly, Mark Latham come readily to mind but each of these has gotten their well-deserved comeuppance. The Tories nominated here are either serving politicians or are sitting back on their tax-payer funded sinecures when many, if the world was fair would be in jail. In descending order of appallingness: #1. Spud Evil incarnate. The closest we have to our very own Heinrich Himmler* this abysmal creature revels in the mistreatment of refugees, exploiting their misfortune purely for his own political purposes. Observing Peter Dutton's behaviour should leave little doubt that behind those cold, dead eyes there lurks the soul of a psychopath. A deadpan, secretive authoritarian of monumental proportions, Il Douche has exploited the vulnerability of our spineless Prime Minister to engineer for himself an empire of dark-uniformed goons, spooks and bellicose door-breakers. One could accuse Spud of using those favoured LNP tactics of the dog whistle and the political wedge except that he has neither the subtlety nor the intellect to pull it off. Unbelievably this creep deludes himself that he is PM material and is maneuvering himself for the top job and, more unbelievably, the RWNJs of his party think the same. When you think, after Howard and Abbott, that the LNP could sink no lower they continue to surprise. *Godwin's Law does not apply whenever the subject is the obscenity that is Dutton. #2. The Wrecker His Feculence, Tony Clownshoes Abbott was gifted the PM's job thanks to the internecine stupidity of the then Labor government and the spiteful mendacity of Kevin Rudd. The fact that the Libs thought that Abbott was their best candidate for party leader says a lot about their lack of talent and their ideological power-at-all-costs embrace of Abbott's negativity and destructiveness. This inarticulate, stammering bully and coward substituted sabotage, dysfunction and antagonism for the vision, imagination and ideas that he so demonstrably lacks. Abbott's political style is akin to lighting farts in a fireworks factory. A weirdo, a homophobe and misogynist, there is something sad and pathetic about Abbott these days. Desperate for relevance and recognition he'll play to any nutter fringe audience. Delusional about his own stupendous failure he seeks validation from the loony-right ratbags in the media. Determined to bring down his nemesis Turnbull he's enthusiastically undermining his own party. He has no self-awareness and a tin-ear. A serial failure, indoctrinated in middle-ages dogma as a friendless child, he casts a short shadow and will be recorded in our political history as a laughing stock. If Parliament House had a belfry Abbott would have a suitable habitat, as it is he should confine himself to a Manly street corner with a sandwich board and a loud-hailer shouting at the less well off and pointing at brown people. #3. The Lying Rodent A master of the dog whistle, the political wedge and divide-and-conquer. An icon of the born-to-rulers, John Winston Howard was Australia's worst Treasurer and as PM manipulated a lurch to the hard right in politics by disenfranchising the moderate voices within his party. Howard lives in a 1950s bubble. His appeal is to the legions of sour, selfish tree-poisoners, old school tie born-to-rulers, royalists and lavendar-scented social climbers forever fearful that others may threaten their rightful station at the head of the queue. Their disease was spread by the Lying Rodent to the aspirationals - the deluded wanna-be tribes of self-employed tradies, suburban accountants and café owners whose only real value to the wealthy establishment is as a reliable source of Liberal votes. ‘Imagine a very committed funeral home director someone whose burning ambition from the age of 11 was to be a funeral home director. Then halve his personality and halve it again, and you have pretty well got John Howard.’ Bill Bryson, Down Under #4. Scummy A tambourine shaking ballot stuffer, Scummy hides from reasoned debate behind high volume ranting. This Jesus-shopper practices his speaking in tongues to shout over the top of any debate. Shouty McShoutyface likely believes the rapture will save his lard arse from the consequences of his tenuous grasp of economics and his embrace of Randesque ideology. #5. Trembles If only his belief in his own magnificence was translated to real life. The smartest man in the room is demonstrably inept as a politician, totally out of his depth, offering only meaningless waffle in defense of his selling out all of his principles in the pursuit of self-aggrandisement. Milquetoast Malcolm's great crime is his surrender of his ethics and standards to the dictates of the swivel-eyed crazies of his party. #6. Barnyard A standout humbug amongst championship level humbugs Barnyard Juice masquerades as an affable man of the land, hiding his incompetence, characteristic confusion and oblique practices behind a ludicrous affectation of veranda-brimmed Akubra that remains untroubled by the sweat of any actual labour. The puce-headed prick has never seen a tree that shouldn't be felled, he's never viewed a landscape that shouldn't be quarried, he's never hiked a field that shouldn't be fracked, he's never paddled a stream that shouldn't be dammed, he's never seen a seascape that shouldn't be drilled for oil. He's a carpet bagging huckster. #7. Chopper With her trademark grimacing, lipsticked rictus splitting her Spakfilla features she always looked like she was a few days late for her own funeral. Bronnie's pretention and sense of entitlement made her a figure of derision while her blatant bias as Speaker made her a figure of disgust. #8. The Ginger Whinger Fringe-dwelling, inarticulate, muddled, inconsistent, uninformed, belligerently ignorant and accompanied by some real nutters from the tin-foil hat brigade with enough members to be dangerous. #9. Otto Rabid acolyte of The Wrecker - a fandom bordering on the homo-erotic. Otto's greatest claim to fame, apart from his being unencumbered by personality or abilities outside of self-interest is his great uncle Otto Abetz, the nazi ambassador to Vichy France and a convicted war criminal. Along with Abbott and Andrews a paid-up member of the triple A.hole troika of the anti-environmental misnamed Monash Forum, rabidly pursuing an agenda to nationalise a decaying power station in stark contrast to the foundational doctrine of their own party. Hypocrisy is strong in this one, with a distinct irony deficiency. Familial leanings have helped Otto become a big wheel in the small machinery of Tassie politics. Like great uncle Otto, he's mostly a spent force. #10. The Rinse Of Darkness An uncanny likeness to a reanimated corpse with persona to match and a total lack of any abilities is not a barrier to ministerial office for those like Kevin Andrews who are true believers in rabid right-wing ideology. This whey-faced abuser of hair dye has had his reanimation fade along with his hair and he's returning to his rightful position as full time political corpse. Overview This is the creep the Libs nominated as their party leader, subsequently dumped only because the public was so appalled. And now, many in their party and their barrackers tout this as their hero and a role model for their future behaviour. This disaster was once our Prime Minister.

A discourse on disintegration - entropy as experienced by the codger Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin and Jim Morrison all did the right thing at age 27. They not so much fell off the perch as flung themselves enthusiastically from it. I am not promoting the notion of suicidal self-indulgence, I am just acknowledging the upside of not having to witness the sad decline of 1960s icons of cool and non-conformance. Have you seen the Rolling Stones lately? I don't want to watch my pop-cultural heroes degrade into geezers but rather to keep them in my mind as fixed-in-time embodiments of youthful exuberance and not-give-a-fuck attitude. They shall not grow old however i personally accept aging as the better of the two available options. In fact, i embrace it. It's true freedom. It's not having to live up to any expectations other than compliance to a codger stereotype to annoy the shit out of the consumerist, status driven Gen Xers and the self-obsessed, angst-ridden Millennials. It is tremendous fun to do so. Geezer fashion Nothing says " i have retained my don't-give-a-fuck attitude " more than does the geezer wardrobe and an indifference to its deployment. Indifference is the key factor - loose Speedos at the beach with one exposed testicle? Codger! A spotless Driz-A-Bone oilskin coat at a Southern Highlands antiques fair - wanker. Dusty and wrinkled at the grand-kid's soccer - codger. (Caution: Oilskin coat + loose speedos + exposed testicle + kid's soccer game = $3,000 fine and a life ban.) Baggy denim jeans with a dot-of-shame - codger. Pre-ripped $150 fashion jeans - style tragic. Is that egg in your beard? Codger! Who cares that the damp spots on the ratty Dunlop Volleys indicate a lack of bladder pressure? Harry Highpants. You can see my belly button? My fly is undone. Paunch not porch - the 'verandah over the playground' allusion doesn't wash when the 'playground' has obviously been neglected for some time and the verandah is sagging over the flaccid, abandoned bouncy castle. Underwear? Optional, but it's dangerous when not worn with shorts. Have you ever trodden on your own scrotum? Hair styles. Nothing says care-free aging funster like furry ear lobes. Facial hair. Non gender-specific. Geezer behaviour Fun for a time-on-his-hands codger is annoying the bejeezes out of the screen-obsessed acolytes of the personal brand and the selfie - the younger generations. Their screen obsession is a symptom of that well known phenomena - FOMO. Fear of missing out. And if there's one thing that really pisses off the Gen Xers (Yers are a bit more laid back) it is the knowledge that they have missed out. And they have missed out. Big time. They missed out on our music, they missed out on our freedom, they missed out on our cheap grow your own weed, they missed out on our carefree shagging. They missed out on the entire nanny state-free vibe. As a consequence they are resentful. Bwahahahaha! Xers are materialistic, they're career-driven, they're status obsessed and entitled - they're a generational representation of what we disdained. They are The Man. They are the mortgaged to the eyeballs, MacMansion-dwelling, SUV-driving purse-lipped finger-waggers and conformists who think that the world can't function without them. Anti-Boomers in a Beemer 7 series. They are a target for the amusement of we geezers. Stationary at a green light to adjust the car radio - that's me. Pulling into an empty servo to the first pump - that's me too. Paying for purchases in small change? Hi! Who's that old fart ahead of you waving through several vehicles at the intersection? Waiting for me to vacate this parking space? I'll just double check my cash register docket. I'm going to justify the wait in that long queue by entertaining the fetus serving behind the counter with several unsolicited anecdotes about the good old days. I will adjust my genitals in public, i will squeeze the avocados, i will pee on the seat. And the floor. I will do 3 laps of the roundabout. I will fart at the movies. I will start the lawnmower at 6:00 a.m. on Saturdays. I will lick the cheese sample and place it back on the plate. I will open the freezer door before making a decision, I will clear phlegm in crowded elevators, I will recommend a particular chocolate to someone's small child while in the check-out line, I will rearrange the furniture in public places and then keep walking, I will go to the most crowded spot on the beach to scatter my left-over chips for the seagulls, I will go into the gym with a cigarette in my face to ask a buffed fitness freak for a light,. I will, in short, go the full geezer. Footnotes Got home after driving down for bread and milk. Had put the milk on the floor of the car on the passenger side. On the drive back the milk bottle had slid over out of reach from the driver's seat. I drove round the block taking the corners at a brisk pace to get the bottle to slide back within reach rather than get out and walk around the car to retrieve it. I scribbled my PIN onto my local ATM. No one knows it's mine. If you suffer from hypochondria does that mean you really are sick? Brandyourself.com says my reputation score is "poor". That's some scarily efficient software. Perusing the low fat, gluten fee, nut free, natural ingredients on offer down at the local cafe - Me: "Do you serve anything fatty?" Cafe proprietor: "Your money's as good as anybody else's, luv." When driving in fog do you too lean forward? Jumped in the car, depressed the clutch to do up my seat belt.