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The LNP Ethics and Integrity Index

It is so very, very difficult to not get spittingly angry when reading about the magnitude of incompetence, humbug, self-interest, greed, lying, obfuscation, meanness and unadulterated nastiness that characterises this LNP Coagulation that misrepresents itself as a government.

The disrespect, indeed the contempt that they hold for ethics, morals, trusted institutions and for you and me is breathtaking. These are the people who stand up for the harbourers of child sexual abusers; those harbourers who, cloaked in their godliness conspired to protect kiddy fiddlers.

They resist scrutiny of the spivs and urgers who infest the banks.

Yet they will spend our money in the many tens of millions to harass and silence those who serve the interests of others or who do not espouse their ideology of selfishness - the ABC, the unions, a Human Rights Commissioner, GetUp and charities and yet they deny, lie and deceive to protect the richest and most powerful organisations on the planet - organisations that have been shown to target the weak and vulnerable as routine practice yet are to be donated billions of our money as largess from their scumbag political mates.

And yet they obfuscate and delay the implementation of a federal integrity commission.

This is a "government" of smear and attack, of wedging and dog-whistling. They are beyond loathing. Following is an check-list of the ethics and standards of this clew of worms.

Ladies and gents, the LNP Ethics and Integrity Index

from The Lying Rodent through to Ol' Jellyback and ScumMo.

  • Barmy Joyce and the Watergate scandal

  • ScumMo and the $180M Christmas Island photo op scandal

  • Australia's debt now higher than all government debt combined since federation scandal

  • Libs fake news death tax scandal

  • Leaking of classified ASIO docs to The Austraian scandal

  • Christian Porter bus for a job scandal

  • Morrison's abandonment of ministerial accountability scandal

  • Michaelia Cash refusing a statement to the AFP scandal

  • Michaelia Cash $800k legal bill paid by taxpayers so she can avoid scrutiny scandal

  • Michael Keenan refusing a statement to the AFP scandal

  • HelloWorld Hockey scandal

  • HelloWorld Cormann scandal

  • Paladin scandal

  • Freedom Boy Tim Wilson's "enquiry" into franking credits scandal

  • Murray/Darling water scandal

  • LNP sham anti-corruption scandal

  • L/NP MPs refusal to agree to the Fitzgerald Principles of good governance scandal

  • Steve Martin $500,000 office upgrade scandal

  • Andrew Broad scandal

  • Tax payer funding of coal-fired power stations scandal

  • Hughes pre-selection scandal

  • Border potection hypocrisy scandal

  • Data decryption scandal

  • Federal ICAC "fringe issue" scandal

  • Protecting religious discrimination against LGBTs scandal

  • Paris climate accords accounting trick scandal

  • Senate filibustering on Nauru kids scandal

  • ScumMo's Queensland Blunder Bus scandal

  • Relocating Australia's embassy to Jerusalem thought-bubble scandal

  • Stuart Robert internet bill scandal

  • Opera House advertising scandal

  • Ignoring the IPCC report scandal

  • Bullying of MPs scandal

  • Nobbling the Walker Enquiry scandal

  • Sausage Rolls Craig Kelly's MH17 scandal

  • Trevor Ruthenberg's false medal claims scandal

  • Prosecution of the Nauru bugging scandal whistle-blowers scandal

  • Nauru bugging scandal

  • Super Saturday/Labor conference date clash scandal

  • Vote to sell the ABC scandal

  • Call for scrapping the GST on super yachts scandal

  • Greg Hunt abuse of Katherine mayor scandal

  • Resisting an RC into the banks scandal

  • RC into child sexual abuse scandal - "Julia Gillard announcing an in-principle royal commission into child sexual abuse, a panicked Tony Abbott falling into line" The Australian

  • RC into political opponents/abuse of democracy scandal

  • Resisting the establishment of a federal integrity commission scandal

  • Gagging of charities scandal

  • $444 million grant to the Great Barrier Reef Foundation scandal

  • Energy companies overcharging $400M scandal

  • Climate change denial scandal

  • Direct Action cash handout to polluters scandal

  • Andrew Hastie scandal

  • Live exports scandal

  • John Lloyd IPA emails scandal

  • Airports identity checks scandal

  • Raising the pension age to 70 scandal

  • Pay Day Lending crackdown backdown scandal

  • Border Farce's Melbourne goon squad scandal

  • Marcus Bastiaan & the Mormon putsch scandal

  • Emma Alberici witch hunt scandal

  • CSIRO funding cuts scandal

  • ABC funding cuts scandal

  • Elite private schools funding scandal

  • Monash Forum scandal

  • Monkeypod Room scandal

  • Gina Reinhard Recycling Centre for disgraced Tories scandal

  • Au pair visas scandal

  • $4 p.h. internship scandal

  • Sharia style corporal punishment scandal

  • Malcolm's $40,000 donation scandal

  • Mal's $5 donation to a homeless guy photo-op scandal

  • Sabotage of the NBN scandal

  • Budget Emergency scandal

  • Mal's personal fibre-to-the-home NBN and rooftop solar scandal

  • $30M gift to Murdoch scandal

  • $900M payout to Murdoch scandal

  • Fiona Nash/Alastair Furnival healthy foods web site shut down scandal

  • IPA to-do list scandal

  • Liberal-IPA links scandal

  • Nobbling the ABC scandal

  • Lack of women MPs scandal

  • Propertied pollies claiming they can live on $40 per day scandal

  • Exploiting refugees for political gain scandal

  • One Nation preference deal in WA scandal

  • Politicisation of the public service scandal

  • Kathy Jackson scandal

  • Morrison's delay on asylum seekers' security checks scandal

  • Corporate tax dodging scandal

  • Slit her throat scandal

  • MDB water theft scandal

  • AWU raids scandal

  • NBN raids scandal

  • David De Garis scandal

  • Simon Birmingham "TAFE is subsidised basket weaving" scandal

  • John Kerr/Betty Windor correspondence cover-up scandal

  • Roman Quaedvlieg leg-over scandal

  • Scared Melbourne diners scandal

  • Gold Coast fund raising scandal

  • Casualisation of the work force scandal

  • Missing filing cabinet scandal

  • Luggage lift at The Lodge scandal

  • South African farmers scandal

  • Dutton's apology boycott scandal

  • Julie Bishop's can't work with a NZ Labour government scandal

  • Nigel Hadgkiss scandal

  • Sale of Darwin ports to the Chinese scandal

  • Andrew Robb's Chinese job scandal

  • Robb's pledged removal of the need for trade qualification accreditation for Chinese tradies scandal

  • TPP sacrifice of sovereignity scandal

  • Poor people don't drive scandal

  • If you want to own a house get a better job scandal

  • Arfer Sinodonos and the Australian Water Holdings scandal

  • Operation Spicer scandal

  • Nobbling ICAC scandal

  • Mirabella's hospitals for votes scandal

  • DIPB/Transfield tender scandal

  • North Sydney Forum scandal

  • Susssan Ley's investment property inspection scandal

  • Lobster with a mobster scandal

  • Border Farce's Melbourne goon squad scandal

  • Abbott's $80M kangaroo court scandal

  • Abbott's leaking of national security documents scandal

  • Abbott's Ditch The Witch scandal

  • Abbott/Credlin "carbon tax" lie scandal

  • Abbott's Sir Phil scandal

  • Abbott's 'try before you buy' employment scheme scandal

  • Abbott's No cuts to education, no cuts to health, no change to pensions, no change to the GST, and no cuts to the ABC or SBS scandal

  • Abbott's $4.3M spin-doctors scandal

  • Abbott's daily announceables scandal

  • Abbott's sleazy wink scandal

  • Abbott's ironing housewives scandal

  • Abbott's women aptitudes, abilities and interests scandal

  • Abbott's sex is a man’s right to demand scandal

  • Abbott's captain's calls scandal

  • Abbotts climate change is crap scandal

  • Abbott travel expenses scandal

  • Abbott too pissed to vote scandal

  • Abbott's troops to the Ukraine scandal

  • Abbott's Putin shirt-front scandal

  • Abbott's G20 embarrassment scandal

  • Abbott's attack of the Garnaut Report scandal

  • Abbott's attempted de-listing of Tasmanian world heritage forests scandal

  • Abbott's "shit happens" scandal

  • Abbott's strangling of Whyalla scare scandal

  • Captain Catholic and his RU486 scandal

  • Captain Catholic and his Gardasil scandal

  • 10 flags Tony's death cult fear campaign scandal

  • Abbott's character reference for pedophile priest John Nestor scandal

  • Bjorn Lomborg funding scandal

  • Dutton's Pacific Island inundation jokes scandal

  • On-water matters secrecy scandal

  • Denial of medical help to refugees scandal

  • Niki Savva's The Road To Ruin expose scandal

  • Monash Forum scandal

  • AGL-Liddell interference scandal

  • Dyson Heydon Liberal fundraiser scandal

  • Fitzgerald integrity principles scandal

  • Julie Bishop Glorious Foundation scandal

  • Penalty rates abolition scandal

  • Sale of $350M Vales Point for $1M scandal

  • NSW ICAC Liberal Party bribery scandal

  • Cash's ooops i forgot my $1.4M investment property scandal

  • Cash's name names scandal

  • Operation Spicer scandal

  • Parakeelia scandal

  • Sydney light rail cost blow out scandal

  • Sydney stadiums scandal

  • Powerhouse Museum relocation scandal

  • Destruction of 330 130 year old Moreton Bay figs scandal

  • Destruction of heritage properties scandal

  • Greyhound racing scandal

  • Sirius Building sale scandal

  • Bruce Billson scandal

  • Construction industry deaths scandal

  • Troy Bell scandal

  • Boswell seat sniffing scandal

  • Mal Brough Big Red Box scandal

  • Free Enterprise Foundation scandal

  • People smuggler bribes scandal

  • Eight By Five scandal

  • Ghost water payments scandal

  • AWB scandal

  • Children overboard scandal

  • Julie Bishop Glorious Foundation scandal

  • Starving the information commissioner of resources scandal

  • Malcolm Turnbull's personal fibre-to-the-home NBN connection and solar panels scandal

  • Tudge's release of personal information scandal

  • Cashless welfare card scandal

  • Free Enterprise Foundation donations scandal

  • Morrison's Liberal pre-selection ballot scandal

  • Bell Group scandal

  • NSW power grid sell-off scandal

  • Bottle of Grange scandal

  • Fishermans Bend redevelopment scandal

  • Damian Mantach scandal

  • Eric Abetz and the Channel Highway Land Deals scandal

  • Eric Abetz and the Ta Ann/Abdul Taib Mahmud/Najib Razak links scandal

  • Downer's Huawei board membership conflict of interest scandal

  • Abetz cleaners' wage reduction scandal

  • Stuart Robert’s China dealings scandal

  • Millenium Forum - Mafia figures donations to a NSW Liberal Party fundraising vehicle scandal

  • Treasurer for sale scandal

  • Indue Pty Ltd Welfare Card program - a LNP rort for the benefit of the Liberal and National Parties and their members, donors and supporters scandal

  • Tony Abbott and Chinese Communist Party-aligned Huang Xiangmo scandal

  • Rolex watches scandal

  • Family Values Barmy Joyce's baby scandal

  • Barmy's $150k leave-us-alone book deal scandal

  • Barmy's $60k donation of tax payer money to Gina Rinehart’s National Agriculture Day scandal

  • Barmy's $40,000 cheque from Gina scandal

  • Barmy's sexual harassment accusations scandal

  • Barmy and the water theft scandal

  • Barmy's free-rent scandal

  • Barmy's APVMA relocation pork barrelling scandal

  • Barmy's inland rail/property purchase conflict scandal

  • Barmy's Narrabri CSG conflict scandal

  • Barmy's Vikki Campion re-deployment scandal

  • Barmy-Campion expenses hush-up scandal

  • Barmy questions paternity of his new sprog scandal

  • Barmy's degradation of live exports protections scandal

  • Barmy's doctoring of Hansard scandal

  • Barmy's $100 lamb roast scare scandal

  • Agriculture department secretary Paul Grimes sacking scndal

  • Cash's doctored transcript scandal

  • George Brandis and the Justin Gleeson scandal

  • George Brandis and the bookcases scandal

  • George Brandis bribe the Human Rights Commissioner with a new job scandal

  • George Brandis crony appointments to the AAT scandal

  • Meta-data retention scandal

  • Abuse of the HR Commissioner scandal

  • Ian MacDonald: I didn't read the HRC report scandal

  • Money for mates Dyson Heydon scandal

  • Choppergate scandal

  • Bronnie Bishop's biased speakership scandal

  • Slippergate scandal

  • Hyderabad wedding scandal

  • Frances Abbott scholarship scandal

  • Christopher Pyne and the Corinthia Hotel changing room scandal

  • Stuart Roberts mining links scandal

  • School chaplain funding scandal

  • Jamie Briggs fondle-a-public-servant scandal

  • Tudge's release of personal details scandal

  • Robodebt scandal

  • Jobs for the boys (and girls) scandal

  • Contempt of court scandal (Hunt, Sukkar, Tudge)

  • $55M Cambodian resettlement scandal

  • Dennis Jensen's dirty book scandal

  • Merc Shoppingtown's political donations scandal

  • LNP propaganda disguised as public service announcements scandal

  • Costello's fire sale of Australia's gold reserves scandal

  • Utegate scandal

  • Turnbull's $10M rain-making scandal

Other references

Jewels Bishop & Wang Yi at the G20 summit

Wang Yi: "Bejabbers! I thought that was my twice-cooked duck."

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